Trials and Tribulations of the Darkest of the Hillside Thickets

The Thickets have a show in Bellevue Washington at the Penny Arcade Expo on the 26th of August. Or maybe it’s the 27th. Now I’ve confused myself. Now I had never heard of the Penny Arcade Expo (or PAX) before, but a lot of my nerd friends are pretty excited that we’ll be playing it.

We’re trying to organize t-shirts and stickers to have at the show, and we’ll also be bringing CDs down. Of course these are strictly promotional as we won’t be selling anything in the US (for obvious reasons). Of course whether or not the border guards believe that remains to be seen. We could have our products confiscated, or we could just be denied access to the border.

Even before the Bush administration, crossing the border was always a gamble. One time we played in Atlanta for DragonCon and Jordan got turned back at the border, so we had to have a fan drum for us.

The second problem is that of our bass player. When I was first asked if we’d play the show, I asked everyone if they wanted to do it. They all agreed. They all said they were available and would do it. That is, except for Jordan, our drummer. Nevermind though, our guitarist Mario is also our backup drummer, so he’ll sit in for Jordan. Recently, however, Bob backed out of the deal, leaving us high and dry on the bassist front. But wait – Mario has another band, and that band has a bass player named Aaron, who, I’ve been told, has played with us once before. So hopefully he’ll know our songs and, more importantly, agree to come down and play with us. I’ll be meeting him again this coming Saturday, and we can suss out what all is going to happen.

If we don’t have a bass player or one of our five band members is not allowed to cross the border, that would be sad. Even though PAX doesn’t have the budget to pay us to play.

The good news is, we’re working on new songs. Lots of them. I’m sure none of them will be ready for PAX, but Allen at Divine wants us to cut a new album, and so do we. And we’ve also decided that we’ll be spending the money we’re getting from selling our touring van on new costumes and merchandise. So now we’re trying to figure out what new costumes would be cool. Any suggestions?

Hope for the future

On Wednesday I borrowed Stephane’s car and drove to Chilliwack. On the way, I stopped at the Yellow Barn and bought some Chilliwack corn. I bought 6 cobs because they were six for whatever instead of whatever each, and Marlo is mad at me because I didn’t buy more, and apparently she told me to bring her back some, but I don’t remember that. When I brought Stephane his car back, I gave half of my corn to him and Sheri as a gesture of my thanks for the use of the vehicle. That left me with three cobs. Well Marlo, they’re all yours but you’re going to have to seduce them out of me first. Corn is after all the ultimate aphrodisiac. Isn’t it?

I also bought a pineapple but that’s a whole ‘nother story.

I drove to Chris’ house and I looked at his latest painting and then we played video games for about an hour. Then I drove to Mario’s. Warren gave me directions but Mario didn’t return my phone calls so I didn’t actually have an address, so I was driving up and down Industrial Way trying to figure out which RV lot was the correct one.

I enjoy driving but it is stressful. I had three cars in my lifetime – a Chevy Nova, a Reliant K car, and an Austen Mini. The Nova I sold for $50 scrap. The K car I left on the highway in flames, and the Mini was never actually mine. My dad had this habit of letting you use something with no stipulations and then springing a “now you owe me this much money” which is the sort of thing I see on Judge Judy and The People’s Court all the time. Anyway, instead of buying the car I gave it back to him and the rest of my life has since been car-free. Being carless was like a tremendous burden being lifted from my shoulders. Suddenly I didn’t have to pay for insurance, maintenance, gas, parking (not that that was a big deal in Chilliwack), and I didn’t have to worry about getting in an accident or getting a speeding ticket or having the engine burst into flames on the highway (see K Car) because I don’t know how to take care of a vehicle. I am not in the least bit mechanically inclined. Give me the magic crayons that allow me to draw a car and the car becomes reality. So, when I drive Stephane’s car a bunch of that come back, specifically: speeding tickets; accidents; mechanical failure. But, happily, every time I have driven it there has been no problem.

Band practice was the reason I was going to Mario’s. Merrick told me there would be a PA there, but there was not, so I didn’t actually do any singing. However, we didn’t actually do any “practicing” because we didn’t practice any of our songs – it was strictly a writing session to make up some new ones. I have this tape of melodies that I add to whenever I think up something, and I made a tape of about dozen or so good ones to give to each band member. The first thing we did when I got there was listen to the tape, and Jordan suggested we start working on one immediately. Mario liked one, Warren liked two different ones. We worked on one of each. There were also three songs that they had been working on themselves, although one of them I have my doubts about. So that leaves four proto-songs that are on their way to becoming new Thickets tunes. I’m going to try to go into the wack again on Saturday the 30th for a weekend with the Woods and another jam session.

Also, Bob cancelled at the last minute AGAIN. We need a new bass player. Anyone know of one?

Also, Garett is buying the band touring van which will get us about 1800 to spend on new costumes and merchandise. Are you excited yet? I want to think up a new t-shirt design. Why is it I often have awesome shirt ideas, but when it comes time to make a shirt, I don’t remember any of them? Maybe I should come up with some sort of pencil-meets-paper contingency.

And we’ve booked a Hallowe’en Show at UBC.

After the jam sesh (that’s short for session, in the same way that mench is short for mention and OMG is short for OMGORRHOEA) Chris and Warren and Jordan and I went to the Husky House and I had a moderately passable chicken burger. Husky has been less hit and more miss these past few visits. Although I did get a lot of fries, which is both good and bad. And I asked for vinegar and the waitress never brought it! So I sat and quietly judged her, and wanted to rip off her “Marlo” name tag and give it to someone more deserving. Airport Cafe is clearly superior in every pie way.

After that I went back to Chris’ and we played video games some more until I had to leave at about 10:37. I got back to Sherane’s at exactly midnight, which is what I told Sheri, so I totally fucking WIN!

Also, Angie gave me a big bag of video tapes complete with black plastic cases, so I doubly won. DOUBLY. And that was my trip to Chilliwack!

Was ist das?

I got a book in the mail from Germany. It is all in German, and it’s all about Star Wars. It has Chris Woods’ painting of the band in the Millennium Falcon and a little card in it that says “thanks.” It was totally unexpected, but very interesting to flip through and try to decipher. There’s a two-page spread of fangirls dressed in the Leia slave girl outfit.

Fun email of the day

Hi Toren,

I just stumbled over your address in my address book, and I thought I should let you know that the Spaceship Zero album rocks on toast!

I don’t know if you remember, but I wrote you some time ago asking if you could send me albums directly, but you were too lazy to handle shipping to Germany 😉 I got the albums from amazon, then. Dies ist Unverschämtheit is fucking hilarious! It’s German grammar from outer space! Brings a smile to my face every time I’m listening to it. You did a pretty good job with the pronounciation and all the american-german grammar is really charming. I think it’s much better this way then it would be if everything would be flawless. (However, I’m volunteering to proofread if you ever want to do german lyrics again 😉

Looking out for the next album,
Jürgen

Interesting music stats

I got this from Palle today:

Over 58% of the 44,476 albums released in 2004 didn’t scan 100 units.
82% of all records released didn’t scan 1000 units.
95% of all records released scanned less than 10,000 units.
Only 58 albums scanned 500,000 or more, accounting for 15% of overall business.
Only 42 albums scanned 1,000,000 or more, accounting for 31.65% of overall business.
This includes compilations.

Stoner Rock From the Damn Near Straight Edge

The Thickets have been described as many things, but never stoner rock. Until now. Considering Queens of the Stone Age is labelled as stoner rock, I have no problem with it. I do find it interesting considering of all the band members, only one of us smokes pot.

http://fishcomcollective.net/index.php?p=reviews&id=1190
http://fishcomcollective.net/index.php?p=reviews&id=1191
http://fishcomcollective.net/index.php?p=reviews&id=1192

I have no Mouse and I must scream

Wednesday Marlo and I went to Green Lettuce and it was too spicy.

Thursday…what happened Thursday. Oh yes, I saw the Incredibles with Yvonne and Stewie and Marlo and it was very very good. I loved it and I’ll avoid going on a killing spree only if they do a sequel. That Brad (Iron Giant) Bird can really put a movie together. I saw a girl on the bus this morning that looked like Violet (the invisible girl). When I take the bus to work it’s filled with gangly, awkward, clumsy teens on their way to school, who serve no end of visual entertainment. I didn’t realize that Jason Lee did the voice of Syndrome (the bad guy) – that’s neat. He was the most entertaining part of Mall Rats. I got a message from my brother that there was band practice that night in Chilliwack, so I scrambled to arrange the borrowing of Stephane’s car. I tell my bandmates that I need lots of notice for practice. I might as well be talking to an actual thicket. But I did manage to get the car (Stephane has a bout of labyrinthitis) and I listened to Bjork and Faith No More and the Rushmore Soundtrack while I drove. It’s an hour and a half each way to Chilliwack. That’s 3 hours of driving and 1 hour of practice. But I like to drive sometimes. Except when it’s really foggy through Langley and I’m tired.

Friday we had the rock show and it was good. Everything went off without a hitch. My voice was in top form – I didn’t have problems in the usual trouble-spots (the end of Frogstar, and Dies Ist Unverschamtheit) which is unusual. I even did the full scream(s) in Sounds of Tindalos which I usually don’t (after Stewie kept bugging me about how that, I made sure to belt them). I saw Dennis and I even saw Jessica Milligan (AKA Je-Psycho) our own uber-fan from days gone by, whom I haven’t seen in years. Pub 340 is a pretty good place to play – and they gave us the guarantee I asked for. I must say we rocked the house and we deserved it. There was no small amount of dancing/moshing. And let’s not forget PUKOR.

Saturday I drew while Marlo loitered lovingly. We had breakfast at de Dutch Pannekoek House and watched Powerpuff Girls. Or maybe I’m getting things confused with Sunday. Oh, I remember – on Saturday we watched Re-Animator and The Day the Earth Stood Still (good movies to watch while drawing), both of which were on Marlo’s ‘to see’ list.

And I did laundry. And that was my weekend.

Back to the old drawing board

I was planning on seeing The Eagles of Death Metal, Helmet, and Metric this month. I also toyed with seeing Goatsblood and some other band I forgot the name of. I didn’t see any of them. I haven’t seen any of those bands before and it’s a shame that I missed them, but I don’t feel too broken up about it. There are things I like about seeing live music (the music, spending time with friends) and there are things I don’t (crowds, bars). But missing them was pretty unavoidable due to work. I’m almost finished the art for Black Company, which technically was due on the 12th. If I’m diligent I’ll get the last 2 pieces done today. It wasn’t a very dynamic weekend for the same reasons, but one of the good things about Marlo is that she doesn’t mind hanging out while I work. She can sit on the couch while I’m sitting at the drawing table, and we can both enjoy watching Enterprise – to her it’s all new, to me it’s just entertaining background noise that keeps me entertained while I draw. It’s a pain, sometimes, that we can’t watch the movies on our list because I can’t actually pay much attention to what’s on the TV while I draw. But we did watch The Others on Friday night after I finished my work for the night. It was pretty good. Very suspenseful, my favourite kind of horror.

Anyhoo, some time ago I wrote up a list of all the best Enterprise episodes (and the ones she needs to watch because they’re part of a major arc) for Marlo but since she’s become enamoured with the Vulcans and Dr Phlox (and rightly so) I’ve had to add a few things to that list. Here’s what’s left of the ‘must see’s before we can move on to season three:

The Communicator – Reed and Archer retrieve a communicator left behind on an alien planet, but are captured in the process. I like this one because it deals with culture contamination.

Judgment: Archer stands accused before a Klingon tribunal of conspiring against the Empire, and faces a lifetime sentence on Rura Penthe.

The Breach: Enterprise is asked to evacuate a group of Denobulan geologists from a world that has been taken over by a militant faction. Really good drama from John Billingsly, aka Dr. Phlox.

Bounty: A Tellarite bounty hunter captures Archer intending to turn him over to the Klingons for a substantial reward. Tellarites were seen in the original series, but to my knowledge not in TNG, DS9 or Voyager.

We’ll probably have to watch most of Season 3, even though it’s annoying.

So far season 4 has been good. And I’m really looking forward to next weekend’s because a) it showcases backstory from the eugenics war, (Khaaaaan!) b) it shows the orions, and c) Brent Spiner plays the criminal Dr Arik Soong an ancestor of Dr Noonian Soong (Data’s creator).

Now back to work for me. Byeeeeeee!

I wrote it down in my diary so I wouldn't HAVE to remember!

If I were to put an ad in the Georgia Straight, it would look like this:

Bass player wanted for The Darkest of the Hillside Thickets. The fewer the addictions the better. Ability to play guitar and/or drums an asset. Familiarity with Lovecraft and Thickets tunes an asset. Access to vehicle a big asset. Access to super cheap practice space in Vancouver a really big asset. Must have own monster costume. Actually that last part is a lie.

In other news the side project has stalled a big fat stall. I’ve got a drumming commitment in Norm but that’s pretty much it. I’ve considered singing for some other band that isn’t put together by me, but with all the other stuff going on in my day-to-day schedule that’s not really any more realistic.

That all sounds like bad news, doesn’t it? The fact is, it’s old news. Here’s some new news, and good news at that: things with Marlo and I are going better than I could have ever expected.

DID IT

I said “Pick a number between 1 and 27” and Joe said “Pi.” I’m going to round down to 3.

Toren’s Mixed Tape #3

circa 1991

Nomeansno “Now”
Glenn Miller “In the Mood”
Screaming Trees “Lay Your Head Down”
Mudhoney “Something So Clear”
Tad “Plague Years”
Big Black “Colombian Necktie”
Dinosaur Jr “Budge”
Masters of Reality “Kill the King”
Pixies “The Happening”
Butthole Surfers “Hurdy Gurdy Man”
Soundgarden “Jesus Christ Pose”
Tom Waits “Sweet Little Bullet”

SIDE TWO:
Nirvana “Downer”
Fugazi “Joe #1”
Harry Connick Jr “You Didn’t Know Me When”
Nomeansno “Body Bag”
Monty Python “Every Sperm is Sacred”
Screaming Trees “Beyond This Horizon”
Glenn Miller “Pennsylvania 6-5000”
Mudhoney “Thorn”
Tad “Behemoth”
Shuffle Demons “What Do You Want?”
Big Black “Texas”
Dinosaur Jr “Muck”
Masters of Reality “The Blue Garden”

It’s likely this was before I had enough CDs to support a ‘one song per band’ limit on the mix tapes.