Films of 2019 Seen and Rated

2019 MOVIES SEEN, RANKED IN ORDER BEST TO WORST

MOVIES I HAVE YET TO SEE

January 26, 2019February 16, 2019

FLICKED UP 2018: 40 Films Ranked

FROM BEST TO WORST

Isle of Dogs
Shoplifters
Magnificent Cake!
The Favorite
A Quiet Place
Widows
Hereditary
First Man

MOVIES I HOPE TO SEE:

Leave No Trace
Can You Ever Forgive Me

May 1, 2018May 3, 2018

Just a Few Problems with Avengers: Infinity War…No Big Deal

Spoiler Alert.

So there’s a thing that happens very often with superhero movies, TV shows, cartoons, and even comics. I’m sure it happens with Harry Potter fiction too, or anything where there’s special powers involved.

The writers forget what the powers do. This is especially problematic with very powerful characters like Martian Manhunter. I remember distinctly watching some episode of one of the Justice League cartoons and thought “If Martian Manhunter had remembered that he can go intangible, this fight would be over by now.”

THOSE PESKY INFINITY STONES

This is a pretty big issue with the Infinity Gauntlet. Now, your average movie-goer likely doesn’t really know what the six Infinity Gems do, and they barely explore that in the film. I’m a huge nerd and I’m not even clear on this. Sure we could both look it up, but let me take a guess: (1) the space stone allows teleportation; (2) the time stone allows you to manipulate time (this one is actually well illustrated); (3) the reality stone allows you to change reality; (4) the mind stone lets you control minds (illustrated in the first Avengers film); (5) the soul stone…???; (6) the power stone…allows you beat the Hulk???

So let’s agree to set aside the “it’s just a show, you should really just relax” mentality, and dig in to the tiny nerdy minutia like a good writer should!

it’s inferred that Thanos is a very powerful entity even without the Infinity Stones, so we don’t really know how much of his power is innate and what comes from the stones. But that’s not a dealbreaker for me.

But those Infinity Stones…oh those Infinity Stones. Given their special powers, there seemed to be a lot of super-brawling that didn’t need to take place for Thanos to fulfill his mission. Sure, they were very entertaining super-brawls, but it seemed to me that Thanos had a very specific task that was all-important to him, and he wouldn’t waste time smacking down some Avengers/Guardians/etc even if it did “bring a smile to his face” (note this line from the trailer didn’t appear in the film).

YOU FORGOT YOU COULD CHANGE REALITY

It’s established I think earlier than halfway through the film that Thanos can use the Reality Stone to turn matter, including people, into ribbons or blocks or bubbles. And yet there are melees that occur subsequently where Thanos opts to hurl moons at the heroes rather than simply willing them into inoffensive vapor. Why? He didn’t think of it? He didn’t want to? Is the most dangerous Avengers villain actually just kind of a dummy or easily distracted?

TELEPORT YOUR ENEMY AWAY

And what about the space stone’s teleportation ability? If I’m fighting Iron Man, and for some reason I don’t want to turn him into bubbles, why not teleport him away to the edge of the universe?

And speaking of teleportation, let’s talk about Dr Strange’s magical gates. He uses one early in the movie and it cuts off the arm of one of the minions. So we know it can do that. If I’m Dr. Strange and I’ve got Mantis keeping Thanos is a groggy state, why not use the magical gateway to cut off his gauntlet-wielding arm? Or better yet, his head? Or is this him keeping to his Hippocratic oath? Failing that, why not plop a portal underneath Thanos and send him to wherever he sent Loki in Thor: Ragnarok? That seemed to work. Sure, Thanos could bring himself back, but it could give the heroes a few critical, game-changing seconds in a life-or-death situation.

It is good move on the writers’ part that the Mind Stone was saved for last, otherwise I would be complaining that there wasn’t enough mass mind control throughout the movie. Iron Man and Dr Strange giving you trouble? Make them fight each other with mind control!

ATOMIZE THE AVENGERS AND THEN GET THE STONES

Another thing that bothered me…just a little bit…was this: Thanos knew who Tony Stark was, that’s stated in the film. He knew, I’m sure, that Stark was responsible for the failure of the invasion of Earth (from the first Avengers film.) So if you’ve got a giant spaceship, or a fleet of giant spaceships, presumably you have nuclear technology. We had it in the 50’s for heaven’s sake. So if you think the Avengers are going to be a thorn in your side, why not nuke them? You could beam a bomb down to Dr. Strange’s sanctorum or just have a guy walk up with a briefcase. Same thing with the Avengers compound or wherever the two Infinity Stones are on earth…and then collect the stones from the debris. Sure, I know, there are many reasons this idea might not work (protective spells on the sanctorum, for example, even though Hulk smashed through the roof no problem), but my point is, at least explore the possibility of obliterating the Infinity Stone carriers from a distance and then collecting the stones, rather than sending a couple guys for a big ol’ donnybrook. Yeah, it’s not as gripping to watch as a movie audience member, but it bears consideration, no?

NOBODY’S REALLY DEAD

The last, and most majorest of the major gripes, is killing off characters that we know are coming back. EVERYBODY KNOWS that there’s going to be another Spider-Man film and another Black Panther film. What, you’re going to have these movies without the main characters? No. So why oh why would you kill off Spidey and Panthery in Infinity War? People say that the ending of A:IW is ballsy, but this move undercuts the ballsiness in a major way, so much so that I have a hard time believing that even the characters killed by methods other than the gauntlet are going to stay dead. Sure they could make Guardians of the Galaxy 3 without Gamora, but I would be very VERY surprised if that happens, given the way they handled Thanos winning the day.

Now, I know that Avengers: Infinity War is actually only half of the story, and we’ve got the conclusion coming up in a year, so maybe, just maybe, all my gripes will be addressed and it will all make sense. I guess we will all just have to wait and see.

In the meantime, I will re-read my Spider-Ham comics and hope he appears in Avengers 4.

Thanks for reading all the way to the end! Here is my Patreon if you like this and all the silly things I do.

December 30, 2017April 22, 2018

FLICKED UP 2017: The Movies I Did And Did Not See

From worst to best:

Bushwick – an interesting idea not executed well

Power Rangers – stupid but sometimes entertaining

Get Out – great potential wasted; motivations unsold

War for the Planet of the Apes – excessive schmaltz

Okja – some great parts and some terrible parts

It Comes At Night – Not as advertised but still good

The Last Jedi – flawed but at least it took risks

Killing of a Sacred Deer – not for everyone

The LEGO Batman Movie – fun and silly with heart

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle – Much better than the original

The Big Sick – great except I didn’t care about the girl

Wonder Woman – end fight a shitshow, otherwise grand

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 – more of the same, which is good

I Don’t Feel At Home In This World Anymore – compelling w/ great performances

Brigsby Bear – original, weird in the best way

Thor: Ragnarok – good action good humour

Lady Bird – great character performances

Spider-Man Homecoming – the best villain in the MCU

Baby Driver – love interest barely works but everything else kills

Dunkirk – intense, crushing, best soundtrack

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri – bold, funny, dark

Unseen (As of Yet):

August 24, 2016December 21, 2018

Too Many Reboots: My Answer To The Claim "Hollywood Has No New Ideas"

Go watch more movies.

Yeah!

January 1, 2016

Movies I'm Looking Forward to Seeing in 2016

THE HATEFUL EIGHT. Is this a 2015 movie or 2015 movie? Doesn’t matter I guess…

THE REVENANT looks great!

KUBO AND THE TWO STRINGS. A lot of white folks providing voices for Asian characters in this one but Laika has a good track record.

NICE GUYS trailer makes me want to see it.

CAPTAIN AMERICA CIVIL WAR. blern

X-MEN APOCALYPSE.

HAIL, CAESAR! Coen Brothers always deserve a chance!

THE LOBSTER. This looks weird. I’m into it.

GHOSTBUSTERS.

WE ARE TWISTED FUCKING SISTER.

ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY.

PEE-WEE’S BIG HOLIDAY. Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is one of my fave movies of all time.

DOCTOR STRANGE

FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM. A Harry Potter movie without Harry Potter? Sold

HOWARD LOVECRAFT AND THE FROZEN KINGDOM

BOURNE 5. I’ve seen all the previous Bourne movies, I’ll see the next.

KUNG FU PANDA 3. I really enjoyed KFP 1 and 2 so here’s hoping the trend continues!

Was never a Deadpool fan and the trailer doesn’t do much for me but Marvel is going strong so hopefully this won’t be crap.

SPECIAL MENTIONS…

STAR TREK BEYOND. As a Trekkie, the reboot is not to my liking. Will wait for the reviews on this one.

THE WITCH. Historical horror films are the best horror films

SYNCHRONICITY. Michael Ironside in obvious Blade Runner inspired Time Travel flick.

December 30, 2015

Movies I Saw in 2015

2015 was not the year of 365 movies, but I did watch a bunch of films. Of the movies that were release this year, here are my thoughts:

Image of The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water

The Spongebob Movie: Sponge out of Water
Not as good as the first one, but some good gags. 6/10

Image of Chappie

Chappie
Total disappointment. No characters the audience can (or should) identify with. Cool guns. 5/10

Image of Avengers: Age of Ultron

Avengers: Age of Ultron
Didn’t like Ultron as a villain, everyone has the same amount of sass. Give the sass to the sassy characters and let the other characters shine on other merits. 6/10

Image of Ex Machina

Ex Machina
Great performance, great story, great ending. 7/10

Image of Mad Max: Fury Road

Mad Max: Fury Road
Not much of a story, but everything comes together visually and you don’t have much time think about the holes. 8/10

Image of Tomorrowland

Tomorrowland
Tragically didn’t’ live up to its potential. 6/10

Image of Inside Out

Inside Out
Frankly this movie bored me. I appreciated what they were trying to do but ultimately I think they missed the mark. 6/10

Image of Slow West
Slow West
Not much of a story but impressive visuals and great moments. 7/10

Image of Ant-Man

Ant-Man
Is Marvel in a rut? If so, it’s a fun rut. 7/10

Image of Taken 3
Taken 3
The usual. 5/10

Image of Mr. Holmes
Mr Holmes
Great character study and performance. 7/10

Image of Shaun the Sheep Movie

Shaun the Sheep Movie
Super fun! Funny. Perhaps my highest recommendation of 2015 despite the fact that I only give it 7/10

Image of Jurassic World

Jurassic World
I’m not a superfan of Jurassic Park, but I like dinosaurs and movies. This movie was a bad joke. It made me laugh. 4/10

Image of Turbo Kid

Turbo Kid
Likeable characters, post-apocalyptic, silly, fun, but even so relied a little too much on the nostagia factor. Worth seeing. 6/10

Image of Terminator Genisys

Terminator Genisys
What a mess. 5/10

Image of San Andreas

San Andreas
Ridiculous but mostly entertaining. 5/10

Image of Z for Zachariah

Z for Zachariah
Post apocalyptic movies are for me. This was a good one without mutants and tricked out cars. Reminded me of The World, the Flesh and the Devil. 7/10

Image of The Martian

The Martian
Smart, fun, good. 8/10

Image of Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials

Maze Runner: Scorch Trials
Another post-apocalyptic film filled with young adults and also Lili Taylor! 7/10

Image of Steve Jobs

Steve Jobs
I don’t know anything about Steve Jobs. I watched this movie and still don’t know anything about Steve Jobs except he was an asshole and a bad father. 7/10

Image of Sicario

Sicario
Pretty intense and engaging, even though I didn’t understand some of what was going on. 7/10

Image of Bone Tomahawk

Bone Tomahawk
Intense, disturbing, satisfying. 7/10

Image of In the Heart of the Sea

In the Heart of the Sea
I didn’t really buy Chris Hemsworth in this role but the tale was satisfying and darker than I expected. 7/10

Image of Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Total rehash of New Hope but we don’t expect much from Star Wars these days, do we? 7/10

January 1, 2015

Movies to See in 2015

Some movies I’m looking forward to. Plus a couple I’m not sure about…

THE MARTIAN

MAZE RUNNER: THE SCORCH TRIALS

SPECTRE

PEANUTS MOVIE

HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY PART 2

THE GOOD DINOSAUR

THE HATEFUL EIGHT

August 9, 2014November 8, 2020

Toren’s Post Apocalyptic Movie Guide (a work in progress)

In which an attempt is made to catalog and compare all reasonably well-known post-apocalyptic films. Corrections? Comments? Additions? Email Toren!

(zombies sold separately)

9 (2009)

Type of apocalypse: war/nerve gas

Location: America?
Number of humans: zero

Years since apocalypse: less than 10

Monsters: robots (with animal bones)

Cannibalism? none

Ends on a positive? Yes

Toren’s Rating: 7/10

12 Monkeys (1995)

Type of apocalypse: virus

Location: Philadelphia
Number of humans: lots

Years since apocalypse: 38

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no
Ends on a positive? Yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

28 Days Later (2002)

Type of apocalypse: virus

Location: London
Number of humans: lots

Time since apocalypse: 28 days

Monsters: feral infected humans

Cannibalism? No
Ends on a positive? Yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

28 Weeks Later (2007)

Type of apocalypse: virus
Number of humans: hundreds?

Time since apocalypse: less than 3 years

Monsters: feral infected humans

Cannibalism? No

Ends on a positive? No
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

A Boy and His Dog (1975)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war

Location: Phoenix AZ
Number of humans: hundreds?

Years since apocalypse: 17

Monsters: radiation victims (“Screamers”); robots

Cannibalism? Yes

Ends on a positive? Yes

Toren’s Rating: 5/10

After the Apocalypse (2004)

Type of apocalypse: War
Number of humans: At least 5

Years since apocalypse:

Monsters:

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: n/a

After Earth (2013)

Type of apocalypse: Environmental cataclysm
Location: Undisclosed
Number of humans: 2 on Earth, multitudes in space.

Years since apocalypse: 1000

Monsters: Aliens, evolved animals.

Cannibalism? No

Ends on a positive? Yes?
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The Bed Sitting Room (1969)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: London
Number of humans: dozens

Years since apocalypse: 4

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? none

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The Book of Eli (2010)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear

Location: San Francisco
Number of humans: hundreds

Years since apocalypse: 30

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? Yes

Ends on a positive? Yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Blindness (2008)

Type of apocalypse: mass hysteria
Location: unnamed city
Number of humans: billions

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

Kadaver (2020) stars Gitte Witt. Dir: Jarand Herdal

Cadaver (Kadaver) (2020)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear?
Location: Norway
Number of humans: unknown

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

Cargo (2017)

Type of apocalypse: virus
Location: Australia
Number of humans: unknown

Time since apocalypse: unspecified

Monsters: infected humans

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Children of Men (2006)

Type of apocalypse: pandemic
Location: Britain
Number of humans: billions

Years since apocalypse: 18

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? none

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

City of Ember (2008)

Type of apocalypse: Unspecified
Location: Somewhere in the United States
Number of humans: Presumably thousands

Years since apocalypse: 241

Monsters: giant star-nosed mole

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

Cloud Atlas (2012)

Type of apocalypse: unexplained.
Location: “Big Isle”
Number of humans: Presumably thousands if not millions or more.

Years since apocalypse: 106

Monsters: no

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

The Colony (2013)

Type of apocalypse: ice age
Location: unknown
Number of humans: presumably at least 100

Time since apocalypse: less than 2 generations

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes
Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

Cyborg (1989)

Type of apocalypse: plague, anarchy, genocide, starvation
Location: New York, South Carolina, Atlanta
Number of humans: Presumably thousands or more

Years since apocalypse: Less than 25

Monsters: cyborgs

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

Damnation Alley (1977)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: California, Utah, New York
Number of humans: At least

Years since apocalypse: 2

Monsters: giant scorpions, killer cockroaches

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 4/10

The Day (2011)

Type of apocalypse: Child-killing EMP
Location:
Number of humans:

Years since apocalypse:

Monsters:

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: tbd

Day of the Triffids (1963)

Type of apocalypse: meteor shower
Number of humans: billions

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: killer plants

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

The Day After (1983)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Kansas, Missouri
Number of humans: millions

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Day the World Ended (1955)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: Southwest America
Number of humans: more than five

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: mutant

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 4/10

Deathlands: Homeward Bound stars Vincent Spano and Traci Lords. Dir: Joshua Butler.

Deathlands: Homeward Bound (2003)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: America
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: 120

Monsters: mutated humans and animals

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 4/10

Def-Con 4 (1985)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: Eastern Canada
Number of humans: Hundreds or thousands

Time since apocalypse: 2 months

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 4/10

Delicatessen

Type of apocalypse: undisclosed
Location: France
Number of humans: presumably thousands or millions

Time since apocalypse: undisclosed

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Doomsday

Type of apocalypse: virus
Location: Scotland
Number of humans: millions or billions

Years since apocalypse: 30

Monsters: no

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

Dune Warriors (1991)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: unknown
Number of humans: millions or billions

Years since apocalypse: 40-60

Monsters: only if desert dwarves count

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3.7/10

Equalizer 2000 (1988) stars Robert Patrick. Dir: Cirio Santiago

Equalizer 2000 (1987)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear

Location: Alaska
Number of humans: presumably thousands or millions

Years since apocalypse: 100

Monsters: no

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 2/10

Five (1951)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: California
Number of humans: 5

Time since apocalypse: months

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

Future Hunters (1986)

Type of apocalypse: war
Location: California
Number of humans: hundreds seen but presumably more

How many years since apocalypse: 39

Monsters: no

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes and also only the first 15 minutes take place in the post-apocalyptic world.
Toren’s Rating: 3.7/10

The Girl With All the Gifts (2016)

Type of apocalypse: fungal disease
Location: Home Counties, Britain
Number of humans: hundreds or thousands

Years since apocalypse: 20

Monsters: infected humans

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? debatable
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Goodbye World (2013)

Type of apocalypse: computer virus
Location: undisclosed
Number of humans: billions

Time since apocalypse: days

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

Hardware (1990)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: unknown
Number of humans: unknown

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: robot

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

Hell Comes to Frogtown (1987)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: undisclosed
Number of humans: presumably thousands or more

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: anthropomorphic mutant frogs

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

How I Live Now (2013)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: English Countryside
Number of humans: presumably millions

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

I Am Legend (2007)

Type of apocalypse: virus
Location: New York City
Number of humans: less than 6

Years since apocalypse: 3

Monsters: feral mutant humans and dogs

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

It Comes At Night (2017)

Type of apocalypse: virus
Location: American wilderness
Number of humans: less than 6

Years since apocalypse: 0-1

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 6.5/10

Land of Doom (1986)

Type of apocalypse: war
Location: unknown
Number of humans: unknown

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: n/a

The Last Man on Earth (1964)

Type of apocalypse: plague
Location: Rome or California
Number of humans: 1-2

Years since apocalypse: 3

Monsters: vampiric plague victims

Cannibalism? yes and no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

The Well (2014) stars Haley Lu Richardson. Dir: Thomas S. Hammock

The Last Survivors / The Well (2014)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Oregon Valley
Number of humans: presumably at least hundreds

Time since apocalypse: years to decades

Monsters: non

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

La Jetée (1962) stars Jean Négroni. Dir: Chris Marker.

La Jetee (1962)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Paris
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes and no
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Le Dernier Combat (1983)

Type of apocalypse: unknown
Location: France?
Number of humans: dozens at least

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

Logan’s Run (1976)

Type of apocalypse: unknown
Location: Washington DC
Number of humans: presumably thousands or more

Years since apocalypse: about 300

Monsters: robots

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The Last Days (2013) stars Quim Gutierrez, Jose Coronado, Marta Etura. Dir: David Pastor, Alex Pastor

Los últimos días (The Last Days) (2013)

Type of apocalypse: virus
Location: Spain?
Number of humans: [pending]

Years since apocalypse: [pending]

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? [pending]

Ends on a positive? [pending]
Toren’s Rating: n/a

Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior (1981)

Type of apocalypse: War/resource shortage
Location: Australian Desert
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: about five

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome (1985)

Type of apocalypse: War/resource shortage
Location: Australian desert
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: about 20

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

Mad Max Fury Road (2015)

Type of apocalypse: War/resource shortage
Location: Australian desert
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

Mad Shelia (2016)

Type of apocalypse: War/resource shortage
Location:
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse:

Monsters:

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: tbd

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984) stars Sumi Shimamoto. Dir: Hayao Miyazaki

Nausicaa in the Valley of the Wind (1984)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: unknown
Number of humans: presumably thousands or more

Years since apocalypse: 1000

Monsters: giant mutant insects

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 10/10

I nuovi barbari (1983) stars Fred Williamson. Dir: Enzo G. Castellari

New Barbarians (I Nuovi Barbari) (1983)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war

Location: unknown
Number of humans: unknown

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters:

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive?

Toren’s Rating: to be determined

Night of the Comet (1984)

Type of apocalypse: comet dust
Location: Southern California
Number of humans: dozens

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: “zombies”

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

Oblivion (2013)

Type of apocalypse: war
Location: Northeastern United States
Number of humans: Hundreds or thousands

Years since apocalypse: 60

Monsters: aliens

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

The Omega Man

Type of apocalypse: biological warfare
Location: Los Angeles
Number of humans: one

Years since apocalypse: 2

Monsters: albino mutants

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

On the Beach (1959)

Type of apocalypse: Nuclear war
Location: Australia
Number of humans: dozens

Time since apocalypse: days

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

Panic in Year Zero!

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: California
Number of humans: dozens

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

Planet of the Apes (1968)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: New York
Number of humans: hundreds

Years since apocalypse: 2000

Monsters: advanced ape society

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The Postman (1997)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: Oregon
Number of humans: thousands or millions

Years since apocalypse: 15

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

The Quiet Earth (1985)

Type of apocalypse: experiment gone wrong
Location: Hamilton, New Zealand
Number of humans: 3

Time since apocalypse: days

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

A Quiet Place (2018)

Type of apocalypse: alien invasion

Location: America
Number of humans: unknown

Time since apocalypse: months & years

Monsters: aliens

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 7

The Road (2009)

Type of apocalypse: undisclosed
Location: Southeastern United States
Number of humans: presumably at least thousands

Years since apocalypse: 8

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? not really
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

Salute of the Jugger (1989) stars Rutger Hauer, Joan Chen and Vincent D'Onofrio. Dir: David Peoples — Salute of the Jugger (1989) stars Rutger Hauer, Joan Chen and Vincent D’Onofrio. Dir: David Peoples

Salute of the Jugger (Blood of Heroes) 1989

Type of apocalypse: war
Location: undisclosed
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The Scorch Trials (2015)

Type of apocalypse: solar flares and “zombie” virus pandemic
Location: America, possibly San Francisco?
Number of humans: Possibly millions

Years since apocalypse: unclear, presumably less than two generations

Monsters: insane cannibalistic virus-infected “cranks”

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? n/a
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Screamers (1995)

Type of apocalypse: war
Location: The planet Sirius 6B
Number of humans: unknown

Years since apocalypse: 10

Monsters: robots

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

She (1982)

Type of apocalypse: apparently nuclear war
Location: unknown
Number of humans: at least hundreds

Years since apocalypse: 23

Monsters: robots, mutants

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 4/10

Six String Samurai (1998)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Las Vegas
Number of humans:

Years since apocalypse: 40

Monsters: none

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The Sky Has Fallen (2009)

Type of apocalypse: plague
Location:
Number of humans:

How many years since apocalypse:

Monsters: demonic figures

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: n/a

Snowpiercer (2013)

Type of apocalypse: climate change
Location: global (train)
Number of humans: hundreds

Years since apocalypse: 17

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Solarbabies (1986)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear

Location: unknown
Number of humans: unknown

Years since apocalypse: 1000

Monsters: alien

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? Yes?

Toren’s Rating: tbd

Steel Dawn (1987)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: unknownNumber of humans: unknown
Years since apocalypse: unknown
Monsters: mutants?
Cannibalism? no
Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: tbd

Stryker (1983)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear

Location: presumably tbd
Number of humans: tbd

Years since apocalypse: tbd

Monsters: tbd

Cannibalism? tbd

Ends on a positive? tbd
Toren’s Rating: tbd

Tank Girl

Type of apocalypse: comet
Location: presumably Australia
Number of humans: thousands or more

Years since apocalypse: 11

Monsters: kangaroo DNA-spliced supersoldiers

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 2/10

Terminator: Salvation (2009)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war

Location: California
Number of humans: thousands

Years since apocalypse: 14

Monsters: robots/cyborgs

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

Threads (1984)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Sheffield, UK
Number of humans: billions

Years since apocalypse: from days to 13 years

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

Tooth & Nail (2007)

Type of apocalypse: blern
Location:
Number of humans:

How many years since apocalypse: blern

Monsters:

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: TBD

Turbo Kid (2015)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war

Location: unknown
Number of humans: scores or possibly hundreds

Years since apocalypse: Somewhere between 20 and 1

Monsters: robots

Cannibalism? Yes (in a way)

Ends on a positive? Yes

Toren’s Rating: 6/10

WALL-E

Type of apocalypse: Mass consumerism
Location: Unknown
Number of humans: Zero

Years since apocalypse: 800

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? None

Ends on a positive? Yes
Toren’s Rating: 10/10

Warriors of the Apocalypse (1985) stars Michael James. Dir: Bobby A Suarez

Warriors of the Apocalypse AKA Searchers of the Voodoo Mountain (1985)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Possibly South America
Number of humans: hundreds or thousands.

Years since apocalypse: 90 +

Monsters: jungle dwarves with healing powers

Cannibalism? unclear

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

Wastelander (2018)

Type of apocalypse:
Location:
Number of humans:

Years since apocalypse:

Monsters:

Cannibalism?

Ends on a positive?
Toren’s Rating: tbd

Waterworld (1995)

Type of apocalypse: climate change
Location: Denver, CO and Mount Everest
Number of humans: hundreds or thousands.

Years since apocalypse: hundreds

Monsters: mutants

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 3/10

What Still Remains (2018)

Type of apocalypse: plague
Location: unknown
Number of humans: unknown

Years since apocalypse: 19+

Monsters: no

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

wheelsfire3big — Wheels of Fire (1985) stars Gary Watkins. Dir: Cirio H Santiago

Wheels of Fire (1984)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: unknown
Number of humans: Likely thousands or more

Years since apocalypse: unknown

Monsters: mutant subterranean”sandmen”

Cannibalism? yes

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 4/10

When the Wind Blows

Type of apocalypse: nuclear war
Location: Sussex, UK
Number of humans: two known

Time since apocalypse: immediate

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 6/10

World Gone Wild (1987)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear

Location: America, probably California
Number of humans: at least thousands

Time since apocalypse: 75 years

Monsters: No

Cannibalism? Yes
Ends on a positive? Yes
Toren’s Rating: 5/10

The World, The Flesh and the Devil

Type of apocalypse: global radioactive cloud
Location: Pennsylvania, New York
Number of humans: At least 3

Time since apocalypse: days

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 8/10

Young Ones (2014)

Type of apocalypse: drought
Location: USA
Number of humans: presumably millions or billions

Years since apocalypse: possibly less than a generation

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? no
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Z for Zachariah (2015)

Type of apocalypse: nuclear
Location: Rural area USA
Number of humans: At least 3

Time since apocalypse: about 1 year

Monsters: none

Cannibalism? no

Ends on a positive? yes
Toren’s Rating: 7/10

Hey some of these are on youtube!

Future Hunters 1986

New Barbarians 1983

World Gone Wild:

Stryker 1983

The Last Man on Earth

Hell Comes to Frogtown

Wheels of Fire

She 1982

Six String Samurai

Warriors of the Wasteland

The Day After

A Boy and His Dog

The Bed Sitting Room

Cyborg 1989

damnation alley

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvLhyQVuyMI

Day of the Triffids

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_AXZKaEg5IM

The Day the World Ended 1955

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghdewXmTguk

Def-Con 4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN0yw9g4Y2Y

Equalizer 2000

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocOCJUs4dJc

March 19, 2014

2014 is the year of 365 Movies

My goal for 2014 was to watch a movie for every day of the year – a movie that I have not seen before. Results are below, and I have emboldened the movies that really stand out.

DECEMBER

31. When the Wind Blows 1986
30. Last Samurai 2003
29. Ace in the Hole 1951
28. Taken 2 2012
27. Bad Seed 1956
26. Bourne Legacy 2012
25. Hot Tub Time Machine 2010
24. Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies 2014
23. The Gambler 2014
22. The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance 1962
21. Get Carter 1971
20. The Imitation Game 2014
19. The Grand Hotel 1932
18. The Santa Clause 1994
17. Monuments Men 2014
16. Daredevil 2004
15. The Trip to Italy 2014
14. Deathstalker 1983
13. Red Hook Summer 2012
12. Now You See Me 2013
11. The Equalizer 2014
10. Home Alone 1990
9. Bridesmaids 2011
8. The Terminal 2004
7. Gone With the Wind 1939
6. The Stranger Within 1974
5. Insomnia 2002
4. Wish I Was Here 2014
3. The Falcon and the Snowman 1985
2. Begin Again 2013
1. Belle 2013

NOVEMBER

31. Obvious Child 2014
30. Three Days of the Condor 1975
29. Sideways 2004
28. Fair Game 2010
27. Munich 2005
26. Foxcatcher 2014
25. The Philadelphia Experiment 1984
24. Angels in the Outfield 1994
23. The Last Time 2006
22. Eye of the Needle 1981
21. Nightcrawler 2014
20. Polar Express 2004
19. Django Unchained 2012
18. The Great Debaters 2007
17. The Hundred Foot Journey 2014
16. St. Vincent 2014
15. Blue Jasmine 2013
14. You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger 2010
13. Post Impact 2004
12. The Colony 2013
11. 39 Steps 1935
10. Los Angeles Plays Itself 2003
9. Mystery Road 2013
8. Whitey: United States of America v. James J. Bulger 2014
7. Interstellar 2014
6. That Thing You Do 1996
5. Cherry 2000 (1987)
4. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2014
3. Radio Flyer 1992
2. The Book of Life 2014
1. I’ll Follow You Down 2013

OCTOBER

31. Words and Pictures 2013
30. Young Ones 2014
29. Earth Vs The Spider 1958
28. Braindead 1992
27. Island of Lost Souls 1932
26. Tarantula 1955
25. Hyde Park on Hudson 2012
24. Coraline 2009
23. The Witches of Eastwick 1987
22. Birdman 2014
21. Kingdom of the Spider 1979
20. Ivory Tower 2014
19. Are You Here 2013
18. Big Ass Spider 2013
17. Beneath Hill 60 (2010)
16. Desperation 2006
15. The Best of Times 1986
14. C.H.U.D. 1984
13. The Chumscrubber 2005
12. Submarine 2010
11. Murder by Death 1976
10. The Life of David Gale 2003
9. The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel 2011
8. Reversal of Fortune 1990
7. Muppets Most Wanted 2014
6. King Solomon’s Mines 1985
5. The 100 Year Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared 2013
4. Tusk 2014
3. Witchfinder General 1968
2. Searching for Bobby Fischer 1993
1. Kinsey 2004

SEPTEMBER

30. The Homesman 2014
29. The Boxtrolls 2014
28. Punchline 1988
27. Popeye 1980
26. …And Justice For All (1979)
25. Earth Days 2009
24. Hector and the Search for Happiness 2014
23. You’ve Got Mail 1998
22. Delicatessen 1991
21. Michael Clayton 2007
20. Deathlands 2003
19. The Drop 2014
18. Suspiria 1977
17. Le Dernier Combat 1983
16. Shrink 2009
15. Midnight in Paris 2011
14. Chef (2014)
13. Sunshine Cleaning (2008)
12. This Boy’s Life (1993)
11. G.I. Jane (1997)
10. Terms of Endearment (1983)
9. Rover (2014)
8. Life After Beth (2014)
7. Maneater (2007)
6. Due Date (2010)
5. Bad Words (2013)
4. The Admiral: Roaring Currents (2014)
3. The Squid and the Whale (2005)
2. The Fault in Our Stars (2014)
1. Locke (2013)

AUGUST

31. Mr. Peabody & Sherman 2014
30. Sleepless in Seattle 1993
29. The Color Purple 1985
28. How To Survive A Plague 2012
27. The Young and Prodigious T.S. Spivet 2013
26. Man of the Year 2006
25. The Great Buck Howard 2008
24. House of D 2004
23. Algiers 1938
22. Dragnet 1987
21. The Arrival 1996
20. The Night Listener 2006
19. Communion 1989
18. The Bed Sitting Room 1969
17. Frank 2014
16. Wall Street 1987
15. The Children’s Hour 1961
14. Rachel Getting Married 2008
13. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close 2011
12. The Faculty 1998
11. Bonfire of the Vanities 1990
10. Snowpiercer 2013
9. Volunteers 1985
8. Guardians of the Galaxy 2014
7. The Money Pit 1986
6. The Ice Storm 1997
5. A Simple Plan 1998
4. How to Train Your Dragon 2 (2014)
3. Bicentennial Man (1999)
2. Boyhood (2014)
1. Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)

JULY

31. Captain Newman, M.D. (1963)
30. Sailor Beware 1952
29. Crimes and Misdemeanors 1989
28. Joe Versus The Volcano 1990
27. Knocked Up 2007
26. Julie & Julia
25. Sabrina 1954
24. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes 2014
23. About Schmidt 2002
22. Hancock 2008
21. Garden State 2004
20. Life Itself 2014
19. Ironweed 1987
18. The Sunset Limited 2011
17. The Big Year 2011
16. This is 40 2012
15. Heaven Can Wait 1978
14. Dungeons & Dragons: The Book of Vile Darkness 2012
13. Empire of Dreams 2004
12. Noah 2014
11. Comic Book Superheroes Unmasked 2003
10. The Comedy 2012
9. Stand and Deliver 1988
8. A League of Their Own 1992
7. Jeff Who Lives At Home 2011
6. Ordinary People 1980
5. Tammy 2014
4. I Know That Voice 2013
3. Battleship 2012
2. 25th Hour 2002
1. Edge of Tomorrow 2014

JUNE

30. Transformers: Age of Extinction 2014
29. Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid 1969
28. Still Mine 2012
27. The Long Walk Home 1990
26. Meet the Feebles 1989
25. Perfect Sense 2011
24. Goodbye World 2013
23. Kramer vs. Kramer 1979
22. The Bucket List 2007
21. Driving Miss Daisy 1989
20. Short Cuts 1993
19. Revolutionary Road 2008
18. As Good As It Gets 1997
17. A Few Good Men 1992
16. A Streetcar Named Desire 1951
15. Altered States 1980
14. Her 2013
13. After the Dark 2013
12. No Place On Earth 2012
11. Trek nation 2010
10. Hitch 2005
9. Doubt 2008
8. Five 1951
7. the Killing 1956
6. Pineapple Express 2008
5. Riders to the Stars 1954
4. A Guide for the Married Man 1967
3. The Grapes of Wrath 1940
2. Small Time Crooks 2000
1. Daikaiju Gamera 1965

MAY

31. The Spanish Gardener 1956
30. The Hunt 2012
29. Six Days Seven Nights 1998
28. Doctor At Sea 1955
27. Father’s Little Dividend 1951
26. World’s Fastest Indian 2005
25. Thunder on the Hill 1951
24. Rebecca 1940
23. Anatomy of a Murder 1959
22. The Trip 2010
21. Hello, Dolly! 1969
20. Role Models 2008
19. X-Men: Days of Future Past 2014
18. Dazed & Confused 1993
17. Saving Mr Banks 2013
16. Philomena 2013
15. Dear Mr Watterson 2013
14. Far Out Isn’t Far Enough 2012
13. Sightseers 2012
12. Primer 2004
11. Don’t Stop Believin’: Everyman’s Journey 2012
10. Jiro Dreams of Sushi
9. Valhalla Rising 2009
8. Godzilla 2014
7. Solomon Kane 2009
6. Pretty In Pink
5. The Pervert’s Guide to Ideology 2012
4. Say Anything 1989
3. With Great Power: The Stan Lee Story 2010
2. Deceptive Practice 2012
1. Robocop 2014

APRIL

30. Beware of Mr. Baker 2012
29. Ray Harryhausen: Special Effects Titan 2011
28. Side By Side 2012
27. Bigger Than Life 1956
26. The Divide 2011
25. All the President’s Men 1976
24. Synecdoche, New York 2008
23. Divergent 2014
22. Confessions of a Superhero 2007
21. Best Worst Movie 2009
20. Step Brothers 2008
19. The Dictator 2012
18. Pandora’s Promise 2013
17. Jodorowsky’s Dune 2013
16. The Troll Hunter 2010
15. Super 2010
14. Windscale: Britain’s Biggest Nuclear Disaster 2007
13. Hara-Kiri: Death of a Samurai 2011
12. The Big Blue 1988
11. That Guy…Who Was In That Thing 2012
10. Heckler 2007
9. Tom Segura: Completely Normal 2014
8. Inequality for All 2013
7. Dykket (1989)
6. The Improv: 50 Years Behind The Brick Wall
5. Captain America: Winter Soldier
4. Skyfall
3. Doctor Strange 2007
2. Battle Beyond the Stars 1980
1. Tucker & Dale vs. Evil

MARCH:

31. The Music Never Stopped 2011
30. Shutter Island
29. How I Live Now 2013
28. Berserk: The Golden Age Arc 2 – The Battle For Doldrey
27. 12 Years a Slave 2013
26. No Way Out 1950
25. Lonely Are the Brave 1962
24. Falling Overnight 2011
23. The Grand Budapest Hotel 2014
22. A Face in the Crowd 1957
21. Strangers When We Meet 1960
20. Prince of the City 1981
19. Gulliver’s Travels 2010
18. Rise of the Guardians 2012
17. Big Top Pee-wee 1988
16. Haywire 2011
15. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire 2013
14. Fruitvale Station 2013
13. Charade 1963
12. Before Midnight 2013
11. Before Sunset 2004
10. Too Big to Fail 2011
9. Carnage 2011
8. Bully 2011
7. Looper 2012
6. The Hunt for the BTK Killer 2005
5. Tape 2001
4. Death Race 2000 1975
3. The Gift 2000
2. The Wind Rises 2013
1. Safety Not Guaranteed 2012

FEBRUARY – 28 MOVIES

Before Sunrise 1995
3:10 to Yuma 2007
Safe 1995
3:10 to Yuma 1957
Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa 2013
Night on Earth 1991
Intact 2001
Exam 2009
Vanity Fair 2004
The King’s Speech 2010
The Night of the Hunter 1955
Lincoln 2012
Buried 2010
The Perks of Being a Wallflower 2012
The Truman Show 1998
Some Like It Hot 1959
The Winning Season 2009
This Is the End 2013
Kind Hearts and Coronets 1949
Sullivan’s Travels 1941
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty 1947
Metallica Through the Never 2013
Attack of the Giant Leeches 1959
Shattered Glass 2003
No Escape 1994
Monsters University 2013
Despicable Me 2 2013
Ender’s Game 2013

JANUARY – 31 MOVIES:

The Lego Movie 2014
Nebraska 2013
Berserk: The Golden Age Arc – The Egg of the King 2012
Blackfish 2013
Brave 2012
The Life Zone 2011
The Thing 2011
Citizen Ruth 1996
Cocaine Cowboys 2 2008
Immortals 2011
Vulgar 2000
Cyborg 1989
Kick-Ass 2 2013
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 2011
The Hunger Games 2012
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince 2009
Shakes the Clown 1991
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix 2007
Willow 1988
Inside Llewyn Davis 2013
Mud 2012
It 1990 Mini-Series
World War Z 2013
Frozen 2013
A Night to Remember 1958
Titanic 1953
After Earth 2013
Ma and Pa Kettle 1949
The Inspector General 1949
Coal Miner’s Daughter