Heres something you probably didnt know: Ive been on the MediFast diet for oh probably about six weeks now. This is the first time Ive blogged about it, and theres a couple reasons for that. Firstly, Im not terribly sensitive about my weight, but I am JUST sensitive enough that I dont like to attract attention to it. Or more accurately, to attract attention to the fact that I am unhappy with my body and am trying to fix it. The other reason was that I wanted to do a little experiment. I wanted to see how much weight I would have to lose before somebody would notice (or at least say something about noticing). So far I think I have had two people who hadnt seen me in a while make a comment. Two at the most. So that experiments complete.
The last time I weighed myself was probably three to four weeks ago and I was down almost 20 lbs, so Im guessing now my total mass lost is in the neighborhood of 25-30. I dont have a scale so I have to rely on the kindness of stranglers.
The diet is incredibly strict, and comes with its own food which is powdered and dehydrated packets. I wont get into the specifics because its dull as hell, suffice to say Im allowed one real meal a day and five of the MediFarce meals, which are tiny but palatable to a non-picky guy like me. I dont really have any problem following the regimen except when in social situations where there is lots of snacks around. Thats a kind of torture but its easy to resist when youre single and you dont want to be.
This is the same diet that Joe has been on for months. You can go over to his blog and see his photo diary but youll be scarred for life. Essentially hes lost 70 lbs or something and hes one of the cults biggest proponents. I am not going to be on it for that long. Despite what he says, I do not need to lose 50 lbs. I wasnt even sure I was going to be on it for more than 5 weeks, but I did end up ordering another 5 weeks worth of their astronaut food. I hoped to lose some of my bulk, for sure, but the other half of the deal was that I hoped to break out of the bad eating habits that I had/have. I have learned a lot being on this thing, apart from the fact that I really miss chocolate and pizza and bubble tea, and the fact that there arent enough yummy, convenient healthy foods in my shopping radius. I learned that there are a lot of sugary, carby, fatty things I ate that I can do without (and several that I would rather not).
I do not want to be skinny. I just want to be average. Joe goes on and on constantly about how much weight hes lost, and he has a right to be happy about that because thats the goal he set and he achieved it. He said to me doesnt it feel great when someone comments on how much thinner you are? Well, yes and no. Yes, I feel more confident. I can ask girls out on dates and rest assured that Im rejected on the grounds that Im a gargoyle and not because Im a morbidly obese gargoyle. On the other hand, it makes me decidedly NOT feel great that I am buying into the side of society that I absolutely despise: the vain, superficial, magazine-cover cosmetic BS that makes me want to withdraw from society, crawl into a cave and be sick. Going on this diet makes me feel like I have surrendered to that side of society and I feel cheap and disgusted with myself. Nevermind that its probably not the safest thing to do to put my body in a state of ketosis.
But, on a more positive note, I see this (ironically) as a starting point for a more healthy and active lifestyle. Ive done it before, the trick is maintaining. I have no illusions that I am going to maintain the edge-of-starvation-slimitude Ill have by the end of the 10 weeks. Soon I will be treating myself to the occasional taro milkshake bubble tea and be happy with the healthy amount of flab that makes Toren the sparkling personality youve come to know and love (plus all my best t-shirts are XL).
