Stephane has put up a “Dealios” web page for really good daily deals around town. Look at it at http://www.chumpchange.ca/dealios/dealios.html and send suggestions to dealios@chumpchange.ca

This just gave me an idea that will probably burn out pretty fast: Toren’s Buddy Profiles!!!

First buddy profile: Stephane Dubuc

Stephane is from Manitoba. I have known him for several years. I met him online somehow (I don’t remember the exact details), like many of my friends, because he was interested in Spider-Man cartoons. We share many interests, but mostly cartoons. He was making a CD of the music on the old 1960’s Spidey cartoons (which is great, by the way) and I had some episodes he didn’t, and vice versa. This was before they started running the episodes on Teletoon. Stephane is helping me to make a Thickets DVD. You will have seen him at any of my Saturday morning cartoon parties and birthday auctions. He has a camper van. He loves the barter system. He sneaks into movies. He is a mystery shopper. He’s a fantastic photographer. He plays piano. He has 2 cats, Brown and Grey. He’s dating Sheri, and they’re moving into a new place together this month. I don’t know how old he is. He looks like this http://www.chumpchange.ca/gallery/film144.html

Free Car Rides

If I ever write a book I’m going to call it What I Don’t Know. They always say what I don’t know could fill a book, so, it’s like, destiny, man. Hopefully this way the book will write itself, really. Because how could I?

How could I?

I went into Chilliwack this weekend but now I am back. Amber drove me out there on Friday and fed me well, and we watched Fubar. I helped her roommates move out in the morning. Moving boxes was fine (good even), but waiting for the cigarette-smokin’, Wildcat drinkin’ dregs of humanity leave their filthy urine-soaked townhouse that the nice people were moving into was decidedly not fine (bad even). Many parts of Chilliwack remind me of the East Side of Vancouver, only the shops close earlier and there are more babies.

Then I got together with Woodsy and we had a laugh-a-minute time playing Magic: The Gathering, driving back to Vancouver, and watching The Animation Show at the Ridge. Tonight’s the last night and I definitely recommend it. It’s at least ten times better than Spike & Mike’s. We picked up Marlo on the way to the theater and as always it was fun times. I think Chris and Marlo bonded over Iron Maiden. Oh, and while I was in Chilliwack I saw my brother briefly along with Garett, Lea & Colin. Some of you may wonder who, exactly, these people are, and I will, at this time, leave you to that.

Amber, who lives in Chilliwack, is in and out of Vancouver visiting her new boyfriend a couple times a week, so I may be visiting Chilliford/Abbotswack (as Marlothotep says) more than just once every 2-3 months. Maybe I’ll even make it to a band practice! And speaking of the band – we may have a show on March 19 at the Railway Club (is that confirmed Stewie? Merrick wants to know who we’re playing with. I’m more interested in whether or not we’re going on before midnight.)

Today, I have a mentor meeting and then tonight, a miniature painting party. When will I fit in working?

I just came back from seeing The Corporation and now I’m going to spam everyone I know to tell them to go see it.

It even has two of Chris’ paintings in it.

I am Ubestridde Ledar!

Is this review of Cthulhu Strikes Back good or bad? All I know is that musikken er snill, mens tekstane er skumle – eller bare rare.

(Cthulhu-monologar?)

An expert panel that was asked to review a Pentagon-funded Internet voting system declared that the system was fundamentally flawed. “Using a voting system based on the Internet,” said one of the experts, “poses a serious and unacceptable risk for election fraud.” The Pentagon nonetheless said that it “stands by” the program, which will be used in several primaries this year. “We feel it’s right on,” said a spokesman, “and we’re going to use it.” Women who have used dark hair dye for at least 24
years have a greater chance of developing cancer, a study found, and frequent underarm shaving together with deodorant use could increase the risk of breast cancer. Saudi Arabia’s highest-ranking cleric said that women’s rights are anti-Islamic. Captain Kangaroo died. – Harper’s.

If the unit that measures radiation wavelengths is called an angstrom, what do they use to measure angst?

I just finished posting a rather long entry in my private diary, so I don’t feel up to writing anything profound on the public blog. But it’s not just because I’m tired of writing. What happened today was something extremely personal and yet something that I knew for some time to be inevitable. If you think you’re a person who knows me well enough to ask personal questions, then feel free to ask me about it next time you see me. For any casual readers it will have to suffice to say that I have made a decision that in the long run will be the best for everyone involved, but at the moment is very painful. Don’t get all worried ‘n’ shit – everything will be fine (better than fine) in time.

I will add in this little anecdote – as I was walking home with tears running down my face I bumped into a friend on the street. I say “friend” but in fact I really don’t know this fellow too well. Anyway, throughout the entire conversation I was (being a man) constantly wondering if he could tell that I had just been crying – and if so was he (being a man) pretending not to notice it just as I was pretending that everything was fine? The whole situation was tragically hilarious and could easily be adapted for a scene in…oh let’s say a Wes Anderson movie.

Con-Fusion.
I am tired from being more or less on my feet all day. I think I had a cold for about 3 hours today. I seem fine now. Everybody is having a really good time at the nerd con this weekend. I forgot (or actually – didn’t have time) to blog about meeting Liam on Friday. Liam is my mentee, he’s great. He and his mom and his friend came by the con today and played Talisman (extendo-version a la Allan Dotson). More on all that later.

I just really wanted to blog to say that I got my highest Scrabble score ever today…I don’t even remember what it was but it was between 429 and 439. I got QUARTET on the first play – so really it was just luck. Marlo & I discovered a new technique where you take your letter and you actually just put it down in stupid places on the board until you get a word that works. I got rid of my last letter (“z”) that way – it was hilarious to accidentally keep getting rid of nuisance letters in the last few moves of the game.

I woke up this morning remembering my dream, but now I can’t remember it. Good thing I recorded it on my little dictaphone. Let’s hear what I had to say in my state of grog:

“I was visiting a house that I used to [garble mumble] as a child…and all the…like…the shape of it was there…the skeleton of the building – of the house was all there. And so I was walking, wandering around through the skeleton because the stairs were still intact. Otherwise it was completely bare, except for there was a hole in the basement, and I could see down. And there was this guy down there, and he had a horse, but the horse had really stubby hind legs, and it was like a pony – it was tiny. It was like a dog size. And so I started talking with this guy, and I told him that this was the house that I used to live in, and asked if I could look around, and he said OK, and he was kind of sketchy, and his horse-dog kept licking me, and then I got to this door and I said “do you mind if I open this door and see what’s behind it?” and he said….uh…I asked if I could and he said “no” and then the dog started biting, like…took a grip t- …my wrist and just would not let go, and so I started panicking, and then this lady came over and she had an animal of some kind as well. I don’t remember what kind. And she couldn’t see the dog – like, she had a mental block or whatever. She couldn’t see this guy’s pet, and he couldn’t see her pet. And that was the end of the dream.”

You can tell a lot about a man when he’s in a room with no women.

I was having a conversation with a couple of fellows today, and we got on to the topic of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. They both agreed (with one another, not with me) that movies and TV needed more hotties like Angelina Jolie.

One of these fellows I didn’t know from Adam. The other I have known for some time and I would consider him my friend. Generally I would say he is kind and a decent fellow. Nevertheless, this statement, and the manner in which it was delivered, annoyed and disgusted me and made me want to go home and be with my cat.

How to DM – The Long (Old) Post

Being a Dungeon Master takes a lot of skills. First off, everyone expects you to know the rules. If you’re lucky (and I often am), one of the players I DM will know a specific rule, so I don’t have to spend 5 minutes looking up the “trip” rules, for example. Keeping all the players waiting while you look up rules is a no-no. The rules in D&D are pretty intimidating if you’re not Adrian or Jon. These are smart, smart guys who can read something once and absorb it for all time. I, for starters, don’t take the time to read through the rulebook (historically, I’ve spent more time creating my own rules than poring through someone else’s) so that’s a point against me right there. If I arbitrarily decide that a rule works this way or that way on the spot, is that going to skew the balance of an encounter?

More importantly is being consistent with the rules. If, for example, I decide on impulse that a certain spell or game mechanic works a specific way (whether or not it’s in line with the actual rules), the players will expect it to work the same way next time. If it doesn’t, the suspension of disbelief is in danger of being compromised.

As a DM – you have to give everyone their fair share of showtime. It’s kind of like being the director of a play. If you give too much time to one character/player, the other players may not have as much fun. It’s really easy to favour (give more attention to) one player over another, if one player is boisterous and forthcoming while the other is shy and quiet. Especially in my situation now, where I am DMing a group that is not as experienced as I usually game with, this can be a challenge. I don’t want anyone to lose interest because they’re not getting the coaching that they need to understand the ins and outs of just what is going on, what is possible and what is not possible, rules-wise or situationally. D&D combat can essentially be a strategy game, and the more you know the rules the better your strategy can be. When the opportunities arise, I introduce the special moves like flanking, grappling and bullrushing, one at a time, to the group.

Control of the table is another issue. Whenever you game with a group of people who get along really well – which thankfully is 95% of the time with me – it’s easy for people just to crack jokes and basically socialize at the table. That’s a lot of fun and there is usually nothing wrong with it – but it can get out of hand. Especially with larger groups, certain players will go off on tangents that may include the whole group or just a couple of players, which can be distracting as a whole. This was a huge issue when I was playing with Chris Woods, Warren and Bob back in Chilliwack. We would just bullshit for at least an hour before we even started gaming, and including our many, many, many tangents could cut an evening of D&D in half. If everyone is fine with this, it’s no problem. But if you want to accomplish a certain something in a session and you’ve got a limited amount of time to do it, socializing can cripple your chances to do that, and you find yourself having to call a game at an inopportune time (like the middle of combat). If people stop paying attention, you find yourself wasting others’ time describing the same things over and over again. If someone doesn’t pick up on a vital piece of information because he wasn’t listening, it can cost their character his life, and that leads to serious pouting. One of the most often heard paraphrases at a gaming table is “well if I had known this then my character would never have done that!”

Crafting a tale is a whole ‘nother kettle of piranha. I DM for 2 different D&D campaigns – in one “Adventurer’s Guild” campaign each adventure has absolutely nothing to do with the next except that each is in the Freeport area and involves many of the same characters from episode to episode. The girl group I run on Wednesdays, on the other fist, is part of a long campaign that I have plotted out. This requires me to take the players on an epic journey from point A to B to Z, and I have to know where I’m going ahead of time. I’m not writing each chapter myself – I’m stringing a series of published adventures together with a common thread, and this in itself is a task. I have to adapt the individual themes of the scenarios into a cohesive campaign. I have to introduce a setup for each payoff. I have to introduce foreshadowing. I have to know the parts that each player character (PC) and non-player character (NPC) will play.

At the same time I’m giving the characters direction with my various plot points, I shouldn’t make my players feel that I am marching them down a corridor with no exits. The players have to be able to make choices that will affect the story. If a player has no control over his destiny, where is the fun? So as a DM I have to be prepared that the players will make decisions that could quite possibly derail my story. I have to try to anticipate their actions–based on the player’s attitudes and the character’s motivations–that I can adapt the story so it doesn’t fall apart. And if I fail to anticipate, which happens from time to time, then I have to be prepared to make stuff up on the fly, and it’s best if the players can’t tell what’s improvised and what’s pre-planned. If they can tell, that’s one more botched suspension of disbelief, as they acknowledge the man behind the curtain.

There are many other things to consider: Am I not giving them enough rewards (Experience & treasure)? Are the magical items I’m providing going to bite me in the ass when the PCs use them? Will they destroy the challenges I set against them too easily, or will I accidentally pit them against a monster or trap they can’t possibly beat? Am I balancing out the combat-to-plot ratio properly?

Are the NPCs I create memorable? Are they characters? Do they have their own personality? Right now there’s an NPC called Wainscotting (an NPC name I use in most of my campaigns) tagging along with the group, and he’s said all of three sentences to the group. In that tiny amount of interaction with the group the players have come to their own conclusions about Wainscotting. Michelle doesn’t trust him. Marlo thinks he’s not pulling his weight with the group. Really, I’ve been building his personality as we go along (but for the players who may be reading this – that’s not to say that everything about his presence is an “accident”), and I’m quite happy with the way things have turned out. I guess I’ve never had a problem creating characters with personality (maybe it’s the actor/impressionist in me) – in the Freeport campaign I had to play two dozen different characters for Sea Lord Drac’s fancy dress ball. It was a challenge, but from playing the head of the wizard’s guild (Alec Guinness) to Drac himself (Christopher Walken) it was also very gratifying to see the players have fun interacting with the NPCs.

I’m a little worried that I haven’t planned enough; that my lack of reading ahead will make the transitions between adventures too rough. But right now, I think the biggest problem with my current group is “dead air.” This happens to some extent in every campaign, but because most of my players are new and inexperienced, if I’m not telling them that something is happening, there is a tendency to avoid decision-making. I guess this is better than a lot of arguing. I don’t want to lead the players around by the nose so I am giving them plenty of breathing room to get accustomed to the game and to one another, and I’m sure as the group plays more and gets comfortable, these awkward silences will shorten and disappear.

That all said – I think this campaign is going pretty well. I think last night’s session was one of the most fun and memorable for everyone: they finally found some treasure, got the opportunity to soundly bash some monsters (in this case skeletons), and found and rescued the guy they’ve been looking for for 5 sessions. Now for phase two: Mwoo-hahahaha!

APPENDIX: Toren’s Secrets of GMing.

I love to keep my players in suspense and keep them guessing. Poker face is key. There is nothing more blatant than going through an entire adventure and glossing over every room saying “you search the room and find nothing” and then getting to a final room and when a player searches you ask them “where are you searching, exactly?” It’s obvious that the room contains something hidden, and the players will keep trying to search the room until they find it. I approach every room and every area as though it had everything the PCs could possibly find: traps; monsters; treasure; damsels in distress; whatever. It may seem a little pedantic and time-consuming, but I think constantly asking the question “who is turning the handle on the door” when somebody says “we go into the next room” simply adds a bit of realism to the encounter (or non-encounter, as the case may be). Randomly rolling huge numbers of dice behind the screen serves a similar purpose – the players should never become complacent that nothing bad could possibly happen while the DM is sitting back with his head resting on his hand.

A final word about NPCs. Non-Player Characters are, to me, a fantastic tool. Apart from all the usual entertainment factors, they provide a mouth through which information (true or false) can be provided. If you need to impress upon (i.e. – warn) a group that a situation is extremely dangerous – you can kill off a beloved NPC to hammer home the point – I find this provides a slap of realism to PCs who become complacent that their characters are immortal. Although I am usually loathe to use them this way, NPCs can be the DM’s deus ex machina: if something needs to be done to advance the plot and the PCs aren’t doing it – you the DM can take control of the situation if need be without a blatant hand of god coming out of the clouds to set things right. It’s a good thing Wainscotting was around last night or Deanna’s brand new character might have been nourishing a growing Grey Ooze instead of healing up in the temple of Dorl Tavyani. Not that that was the only way out, but it just so happened that all the other characters nearby couldn’t win a grapple check with all the grace of Terak on their side.