Toren Atkinson

Merry Dec 25

You know what? You’re right.

If I’m sitting with a big pile of Dec 25 gifts on Dec 25 morning, and I go through them, unwrapping one after the other like so many gizmos on a conveyor belt, I might not appreciate each individual gift as well as I otherwise would if I spread the gifts out over several days or even weeks. Although I cannot deny the magic of sitting by the Dec 25 tree (or in my case, the drawing of it) surrounded by joyous material goods like I did when I was a kid*, receiving a gift on January 3rd would quite possibly make it even more special.

Thus – if your Dec 25 present from me is post-Dec 25, call it “extra love & meaning” not “lazyness and leaving it too late”.

Firstly: Yesterday was the best mail day ever. In the history. Of. Time.

Secondly: At the Placebo Sofa Cinema:

The STAR WARS festival. Saturday, Dec 20 at 3:00 pm. $5
The original movies (without digital “enhancements”) on laserdisc no less, along with a whole bunch of Star Wars madness! The Xmas special, commercials, the muppets… ahhhhh!

Let’s fuckin’ go!

Marlo made me post one of those silly internet surveys. With her guile, she did it. It contains information both trite and inspired. Read at your own risk. I promise a real entry will be made soon.

1. I am happiest when: I’m connecting with someone (usually emotionally AND physically) that I really care about.
2. I feel lonely when: I browse personals sites
3. The ideal relationship would be: soon – haha.
4. Favorite movie (s): Coen Brothers films, Wes Anderson films, Hayao Miyazaki films, and the movies in my head.
5. Favorite author: H.P. Lovecraft – duh!
6. What makes you cry: movies – especially with sad music; other things I’d rather not go into right now but that thankfully are rare; being bitten by the inland taipan snake.
7. Introvert or extrovert: Introvert
8. Do you think too much: Sometimes. But most of the time I don’t think enough.
9. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be: Doesn’t matter. More importantly is with whom.
10. A famous person you would like to meet: Chris Stewart. Anyone who’s not a jerk, I guess. Any of a myriad of artists better than me who could teach me a thing or two.
11. Do you believe in organized religion: I believe it exists.
12. Pro-life or pro-choice: Pro-common sense and foresight.
13. Are you a vegetarian: Sometimes.
15. Do angels or demons exist: IN MY PANTS!
17. Do you have any regrets: I sure do!
18. Sex or love: Love with a side order of sex.
19. Favorite coffee: Is there a coffee that doesn’t taste like coffee?
20. Brand of cigarettes: The brand that when you smoke money falls from the sky.
21. Favorite scent: Wood being burnt or cut – which is a terrible thing because wood being burnt or cut makes me sad (but not cry!)
22. What really makes you mad: commercials. Especially asinine commercials that I’m paying to have shown to me; Bureaucracy; forgetting how to spell “bureaucracy”
23. Favorite way to waste time: Sleeping is the only real waste of my time besides the time I spend focusing on things I can never have.
26. What is your best quality: My notable absence from high society.
27. Are you currently in love/lust: Yes.
28. What’s the craziest thing you have ever done: Um – started a Lovecraftian punk band? I’ve lived the same place for 7 years – that’s pretty crazy, and kind of sad.
30. Any bad habits: Obviously.
31. Do you find it hard to trust people: No.
32. Do you ever doubt yourself: Never. Or, actually, maybe I do.
33. Last book you read: It’s been too long since I read a book all the way to the end. I may have a problem.
34. Last thing you bought for yourself: fancy pens.
36. Favorite season: Fall. The “windy, orange” season
37. Porn or erotica: Can I choose erotica with photos/illustrations/video?
38. What is your favorite flavor: licorice; almost anything found in an Indian restaurant.
39. What is your favorite time of day: when the sun is setting and casting orange light on the clouds and tall buildings, which then reflects onto the street and all the people (especially if it happens to be windy). About a month or 2 ago the sky was filled with dark, low clouds, but the sun got through somewhere and reflected off the clouds to create a surreal, twilight-zonish suffused light that soaked into everyone on Oak Street. It was cool and I’d never seen anything quite like it before.
40. Gold or silver: potato.
41. What is the lamest pickup line someone has used on you: I don’t remember anyone ever using a pickup line on me. If they did, I probably wouldn’t have been able to tell. I am dense.
42. Silk sheets or cotton: potato.
43. Any secret crushes: Probably not-that-secret.
44. Do you ever feel you are insane: Once or twice I thought I was having a brain failure, but I wouldn’t classify that as insanity (yet).
45. Favorite style of music: good
46. Favorite film genre: good
47. If you could be the opposite sex for one day, would you do it: Absolutely. Unless there was some horrible ironic twist, like I was a woman without any fun bits, or I was a woman in a country where women are subjugated and treated like shit.
48. What do you desire most in life: to bring the most amount of joy to the people who most deserve it; to open/loosen up; to not have a horrible horrible disease; to accomplish many fun and exciting things.
49. Do you believe in destiny: I believe that if you fall, it is your destiny to hit the ground.
50. Is world peace attainable: Yes, in batches.
51. City or country: First city, then country. Then maybe city again. Then country?
52. Are you more inclined to set short or long term goals for yourself?: Short.

Feel free to cut and paste with your own answers (you may have to break it up if you want to post it in my comments, otherwise please send me a link to where I can read it.

I edited my wish list – added those black VHS cases you can get at London Drugs etc for…I dunno – I suspect 1.99 each (or less). I want to tidy up my video collection, you see.

The Temple of Gingerbread Evil

Last night we had a very small Snuggly Winter Get-Together/potluck right here at Home Base 302. I provided many nuts and oranges, as well as drinks. Yvonne arrived while I was at Sunshine Market and she made what I consider to be the finest dish hands down. I said hands down! Alright? Not that the other food was poo or anything, but I gotta tell ya, brown sugary yams with ginger and almonds. Tasty, tasty and tasty. Mr. Slater (aka cas) and Kathryn (aka kstanger) arrived from the depths of Langley with gingerbread cookies and Kraft Dinner. Mmmarlo showed with a massive load of coleslaw with crunchy noodles and a big ol’ bag of popcorn, with which many sewed garlands for our hexmas tree, which was hand drawn on the back of a ballet poster, complete with mistletoe and a cast iron tree stand. I made a sizeable batch of gingerbread while others decorated the cookies with dribbly ice cream. No, not dribbly – drooly. No, not drooly, drippy. No, not drippy, drizzly. Drizzly Adams. Anghold and Dalia the Conqueror came bearing a tasty bean salad (which I just finished off) and white trash nacho dip.

After food, we watched varous Christmas specials – like The Tick, Simpsons (not the first one with Santa’s Little Helper – the other one with Gary Coleman), Futurama (the two X-mas Santa robot ones), How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and Blackadder (not in that order). When the gingerbread was done, we cut out slabs and began construction on our ambitious gingerbread dungeon. Stewie even made little gingerbread characters. It’s not quite done yet, but when it is, I’ll post photos.

Yvonne & Marlo kept the couches from floating away throughout the night (bless their super-dense bodies) and today Y and I went to Loomis whereat I bought some more nifty pens. Oh, and a crazy old lady (there can be no other description, really) spat at and yelled at a nice fellow who was trying to pull her out of the way of a moving bus, on the grounds that he was a pursesnatcher. Now that I think about it, everytime I experience some sad and awkward encounter on the streets of Vancouver I’m with Yvonne. Hmmm…

A sequence of events that will change the course of your life forever.

Tonight: Gingerbread Dungeon. Awwwwwwwww yeahhhhhhhhhhh. Bring your cameras.

I’m listening to techno, and have been for at least 2.5 hours.

Okay I knew that photo of me with the gun would raise some eyebrows. It’s only a b-b gun. (Bee-bee gun? Whatever). Mr. Woods got it through the mail because he’s a crazy fool. But I love him so.

The photo is meant to be ironic. I would never touch a real gun. Back in 1993 or 94 we were “on tour” and we were staying at a friend of Warren’s in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. The people who lived in the house got out a gun to show Warren and Devon, and I went into the other room. They then went out to shoot things – I think at a firing range. Tara and I stayed at the house and watched Wile E. Coyote. That’s the kind of violence I prefer, by far.

Life is strange and wonderful in many ways. Thank you, my friends…see you soon.

I had an amazing weekend with Chris & Angie, Yvonne & Anghold. I spent almost no time on the interweb. A trend which I will continue tonight.

Tomorrow: swimming.
Wednesday: VGG Meet.
Thursday: Mutants & Masterminds

Stephane pointed out this cinema in town: Placebo “Sofa Cinema.” It’s 3 Blocks West of Commercial Behind Grandview Park and I am dying to see what it’s all aboot. Double bills are $5 and this month they are showing:

Monday Dec 15 – O Brother Where Art Thou
Wednesday Dec 17 – The Iron Giant (one of the best films ever) + The Hulk Monday Dec 22 – Groundhog Day
Friday Dec 26 – Akira + Mars Attacks
Saturday Dec 27 – 12 Monkeys + Last Night
Sunday December 28 – Princess Mononoke + The Dark Crystal

If you live in or near Chilliwack, come and see me in Bob’s short film Unrecoverable Error

Date: Saturday 6 December 2003
Venue: Chilliwack Arts Centre, 45899 Henderson Avenue
Time: screening begins at 8.00 pm, doors open at 7.00 pm
Cost: $5.00 per person