Toren Atkinson

For the record, if I was going blind I would totally authorize a Toren clone so I could harvest some new eyes. But I probably wouldn’t be able to afford it.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/now-we-have-the-technology-that-can-make-a-cloned-child-808625.html

Joe thought I would like the copy of Bloodcurdling Tales of Horror and the Macabre when he lent it to me. He probably didn’t think I would base a musical career on H.P. Lovecraft’s writings. The first story in the book, and the first I read, was “Rats in the Walls.” Though not steeped in the Cthulhu Mythos it is a great tale. My Lovecraft band was what got my foot in the door at Pagan Publishing, the wellspring of my illustration career in game books since 1996.

I have a vast cartoon collection. The Herculoids got me started collecting at about the time I got the internet and realized that other people might have this on tape. I only had vague memories of it being super awesome from watching it when I was a kid. Of course it is not super awesome…in that way. One of my other early cartoon memories was thinking that the robot spy from Jonny Quest was from an episode of the Fantastic Four cartoon. I love cartoons. Before I had a VCR, I would put a tape recorder up to the TV and record the audio from Superfriends. Often I also wrote down the plot on a note pad for story ideas for my comics or, later, roleplaying games.

The first three compact discs I bought were Butthole Surfers, Nomeansno and possibly Big Black or Dinosaur Jr. Nomeansno was my favourite band for a long time, and my favourite album of all time was “Wrong” by same. Much later I was introduced to Kyuss. They broke up, but everyone but the singer went on to form Queens of the Stone Age. When the first full length, self-titled album came out, it eclipsed Wrong for a long time. Now I don’t know what my favourite album is, but Nomeansno and QOTSA are safely in my top 5 musical performers of all time.

I don’t know if it’s my best D&D game ever, but playing D&D with Chris Woods, Warren and Bob are probably the most memorable, especially when Bob was DMing. I had a lawful evil halforc who used a modified oar for a weapon, ever at odds with Chris’ lawful good paladin. Tradition dictated we go for a snack break to the 7-11 in mid-game, and the results were pretty predictable – Big Gulps, ding dongs, and mesquite barbecue ships, amongst many others. Shortly after the sugar high Bob would start nodding off. We knew that was the time to start bending the rules a bit. When I started playing D&D in high school, I don’t remember who was DMing – Ken I think – but I would follow up with a crude grade 9 comic strip of what happened.

Although I am not a meme fiend in any way, my friend posted 100 Things About…Her on her blog and I think that would be fun to do right here. However, I would like to make it more interactive. So, if you want to know something about me, ask in the comments and I’ll address it, hopefully in a full and interesting way. Go ahead – ask me anything!

This may be a passing fancy. I know I’ve said I’d do a lot of things on this blog that I didn’t follow through on but…well…fuck you!

The first time I called Shaw I just wanted to cancel my cable tv, not my internet. The lady said that a service dude would have to come by my old place in Shaghnessy “just in case” and that I would have to be there. I didn’t want to make a special trip so I just said forget the whole thing. Then I seemingly got my connection issue here in Kits resolved so I called again to cancel everything. This time no mention of the above issue was made so I was glad. I also specifically asked if they needed the modem back because I was under the impression that I had been renting. She said “nope, it’s yours.” Fancy that! End of call.

I got a call a day or two later from Shaw saying I need to come downtown and drop off my modem. I almost never go downtown, for those who like to keep track. Now frustrated, I did my best to frustrate the Shaw guy (Ruprecht) on the phone. I asked him where all the drop off points were. There were none close to me so I scheduled an appointment for a service dude to come by and collect it. So me and Ruprecht spent the next several minutes going through my daybook and finally settling on a Saturday morning.

The Thursday or Friday before I got a call from another lady at Shaw (Deirdre): “So, what are we going to do about our modem?”
Me: “Well, someone is coming to pick it up on Saturday between 8am and noon. I certainly am looking forward to getting up early so I don’t miss this window.”
Deirdre: “No, that appointment was cancelled.”
Me: “This is the first I’ve heard of that.”
Deirdre: “It was cancelled by Mike.”
Me: “Who is Mike?”
Deirdre: “Mike [Your Roommate]”
Me: “I didn’t tell him about anyone coming by, how could that happen?”
Deirdre: “etc etc – let’s reschedule for Monday evening in between 6pm and 8pm.”
Me: “Oh let’s do!”

Today (Monday) I get a call at 4:45 – while I’m at work – from Shaw and then from Mike saying that the Shaw has come by to pick up the modem. Mike’s conversation was, as I understand it:

Shaw guy: “I’m here to pick up a modem”
Mike: “I don’t know where it is, let me look for it” Mike enters Toren’s room, Kodos goes into executioner mode, Mike closes door, goes back to Shaw guy. “When was Toren expecting you?”
Shaw guy: “6pm”
Mike: “It’s not 6pm.”
Shaw guy: “I know, I was in the neighborhood.”
Mike: “Come back at 6pm.”

I got home at 5:40. The guy came back at around 7pm. The prepared receipt was made out to Mike.

WTF.