1000 years after the Neutron Wars, nomadic ranger guide manly Kas Oshay and sexy blonde Deneer hang out in the wasteland riding horses, until captured by riders on their Death Machines (AKA dirt bikes with spacey-looking consoles) and brought back to the walled city of Helix. Tortured by the mad and dying Lord Zirpolo, and forced to partake in Deathsport (AKA a dirt bike track), they somehow break free and escape back into the wasteland, with former ranger guide and Zirpola lieutenant Ankar Moor in hot pursuit. After a brief encounter with cannibalistic cave mutants Kas and Ankar have a duel with clear plastic swords.
Apparently a sort-of sequel to Death Race 2000, this movie is a lot of riding around on bikes with obnoxious sound effects while explosions happen close by, punctuated with some T&A courtesy of playmate Claudia Jennings. The only cast member with any charisma is Richard Lynch. Oh yeah there’s a kid that is thankfully relegated to the beginning and end of the film.
TROPES: vehicles explode for no reason; futuristic jargon; lights flash when torture is happening; exposition about what’s happening on screen; blowing on a gun; mutants only grunt
Season 16, 1979, 6 parts, Fourth Doctor (Tom Baker)
The Doctor and Romana land on the planet Atrios and meet Princess Astra, her lover Merak, and The Marshall, the latter of which is war-mad about defeating neighboring planet Zeos in their ages-long war. Secretly Zeos is run by an AI, which is secretly run by a guy in a skull mask (The Shadow – he hates light) who also is secretly advising the Marshall through a black mirror. The Shadow is an agent of the Black Guardian and is hunting for the sixth segment to the Key to Time, which (spoiler) is Princess Astra. K9 is captured by The Shadow and reprogrammed, while Astra is likewise corrupted and transforms herself into the puzzle segment. The Shadow gains entry to the TARDIS while The Doctor is miniaturized by friendly Time Lord Drax (found in the bowels of The Shadow’s space base). The Shadow puts the Time Key together and starts monologuing so The Doctor returns to size, grabs the macguffin and our heroes get away.
The Doctor practically turns to the camera and says the name of the episode out loud, which is always fun. This is the final chapter in the Key of Time story arc which spans the entire 16th season. Overall, a disappointing climax to a fun season. This could easily have been 4 episodes, there’s a lot of chaff in the first 3. It only gets interesting when K9 becomes a servant of The Shadow and The Doctor bumps into Drax. Given how overpowered K9 is as an ally, he should be more of a threat to The Doctor, but he’s defeated easily and stupidly. Also it occurs to me that K9’s eyes are always red, so how can we tell when he’s good or evil? In a rare twist Romana upstages The Doctor when she clues him into the fact that the White Guardian is the evil Black Guardian because he’s unwilling to restore Astra to human form. This leads to the question, was there ever a White Guardian, or was it the Black one all this time?
Took the high speed rail from Kaohsiung to Taipei (a 2 hour 20 minute trip) where I saw the mountains and farmland of Taiwan
We arrived and walked around the neighborhood of our hostel, and visited the
National Sun Yat Sen Memorial Hall
Creepy
I wanted to try Britshake, the British-themed restaurant, to see how it was in Taiwan. Unfortunately, not super memorable. So I won’t bother with pics. Anyway – here’s an interesting chart showing the ethnographics of Taiwan
A little park/mosquito breeding ground
Check out the space age 7-11. What happens in there? I don’t know
It’s a gas station just for scooters. They’re ubiquitous!
Your average Taipei commuter train station
We met up with two of Erica’s old friends, Frankie and Andy, at
Kokoro izakaya (Japanese bar with food)
where I had a cute little cumquat, deep fried bitter melon (yummy) and some nuts of some kind!
After that we went to a lesbian karaoke bar that I believe was called 7 Plus, but I couldn’t find it on google. It was…interesting, because the lesbians will try to chat you up for tips, which I found to be awkward, because although they were very nice and tried hard to make me feel welcome – I don’t really drink, and we don’t speak the same language. But there was some karaoke so not too bad!
I wanted to go to the poo-themed restaurant I had heard about years prior, but sadly they had permanently closed 🙁
Should you find yourself at Mitsui Outlet Park in Tainan, be sure to visit Gozen Kamicha!
Former fishing settlement on a forested island, with water sports & a beach with sunset views. Travel Tainan says “Yuguang Island, connected to the bustling Anping District by the Yuguang Bridge. Visitors can stroll along the beach or step barefoot into the waves to feel the caress of the sea breeze and the cool seawater lapping at their ankles.”
All true!
First thing on the island is the small area of vendors, and a temple of course.
A beautiful wooden path leads to the beach. Maybe to protect your feet from snakes? I didn’t see any snakes.
Fourth story in the Key of Time series. The Doctor and Romana split up immediately and Romana is captured by the evil Count Grendel, who is using android duplicates to try to seize the throne. The Doctor and K9 have to rescue Romana twice, culminating in a sword duel. Also the princess is a doppelganger of Romana for an unexplained reason.
A fairly basic plot with low stakes, which could have been improved with tighter writing and directing. Apparently this is a take on The Prisoner of Zenda, which I have not read. Baker and Tamm have a good time. Not what I would call an essential episode by any stretch, but there’s horses and regal garb so there’s that.
Had some unscheduled time today so, after I grabbed breakfast from Mei Zi Quan Breakfast Restaurant 美滋泉早餐店 (or maybe it was Tian Tian Wu Breakfast Restaurant 甜甜屋早餐店),
I walked aimlessly and found myself at Anning Street where umbrellas decorated the space between buildings overhead
Time to grab a U-Bike!
And go where? Why a little bike tour from Lane 450 to Lotus Pond and back. Like this:
One issue I’ve noticed both as a player and DM is that names of non-player characters get lost in the mix, sometimes because they are too banal or otherwise forgettable. If you as a DM want your players to remember that important NPC’s name, I’m here to help you pick one!
You probably won’t recognize some of these names as cars, but I assure you, I’ve done my research, all the way back to 1889. This is one part of a larger series. Note: if you run a serious campaign where jokes are frowned upon, this list is not for you!
Acura – maybe put the emphasis on the second syllable
Ajax – also a figure in Greek mythology
Alfa Romeo
Altima
Argo – also the ship from Jason and the Argonauts!
Astra -literally means a star
Audi
Austin
Bendix
Bentley
Bolt
Borgward – possibly an orc name?
Buckeye – also a tree!
Bugatti – some people told me to not include this one but it just sounds too great.
Camaro
Carhartt
Cayenne – also a spice!
Citroen
Cricket
Cutlass
Cyklon
Daihatsu
Dingfelder
Dudly Bug
Durango
Edge – probably a rogue or some guy who thinks he’s cool.
Elantra
Elgin – sounds like a scholar to me
Envista
Ferrari
Fiat
Ford
Forester
Grout
Gurgel
Gurley
Gutbrod – another orc name? Or a dwarf?
Harley
Heinkel
Huracan
Impreza
Jetta
Kermath
Kia
Kukushka
LeRoy (accent on the second syllable, HATES being called LEE-roy)
Levante
Lexus
Lincoln
Lockheed
Lux
Malibu
Maserati
Maverick
Maxima
Mercedes
Metris
Murano
Nautilus
Niro
Omikron
Otto
Packard
Passat
Peugeot
Pieper – pronounced ‘peeper’ if you like
Piggins – a plump halfling?
Porsche
Portofino
Primus Priamus Prius
Protos
Renault
Rickenbacker
Riker
Roma
Rover
Royce
Saab
Savana
Scion
Sienna / Sierra
Sirocco – also a Mediterranean wind!
Solidor
Solterra (literally ‘sun earth’)
Sonata
Sorento
Spark
Spaulding
Sprinter
Stinger
Studebaker
Talbot
Telluride
Tiguan
Trax
Urus
Wartburg
Wendax
Wingle Yugo
Zender
YOU MAY ALSO ENJOY… 500 Post-Apocalyptic Place Names
Essential? Yes. This episode explains some of Venger’s backstory, and what master he serves. Game Adaptation Friendly? It could be challenging but also interesting to take away kids’ weapons of power during the Underworld set pieces. Possibly your players would hate it. AD&D Monsters: Shadow demon, salamanders, duergar (possibly), purple worm Bonus monsters: He Whose Name Cannot Be Spoken
When the kids release a powerful evil entity from the Box of Balefire, DM drains the Weapons of Power to fend it off, and escape to the Underworld. Without magic and with Venger on their heels, the kids are separated one by one as they cross the Planes of Fire to revivify DM in the Dungeon at the Heart of Dawn.
Notes: Starts off with the characters in pitch black, saving thousands on the animation budget! Frank Welker voices Hogar the duergar.
23. THE TIME LOST
Essential? No but as a kid’s cartoon with Nazis it’s worth a watch Game Adaptation Friendly? No this could go sideways in many many ways. AD&D Monsters: blue dragon
Venger uses the Crystal of Chronos to send a Nazi fighter pilot back to WWII Germany with modern jet technology to win the war for Germany, thus eliminating the kids before they’re born.
Notes: Diana has never seen an American fighter jet. Frank Welker Voices: American fighter pilot
24. ODYSSEY OF THE 12TH TALISMAN
Essential? No Game Adaptation Friendly? AD&D Monsters: jackalope. Bonus monster: some kind of dire camel or possibly off-model catoblepas
DM quests the kids to find and destroy the unpredictably dangerous Stone of Astra, which is in the hands of a kid that Eric bonds with named Lorn. An evil wizard frames the kids in an effort to acquire the artifact.
Notes: this is Eric gets a friend episode. Frank Welker voices the wizard Korlock
25. CITADEL OF SHADOW
Essential? No Game Adaptation Friendly? No AD&D Monsters: orcs. Bonus monster: flying bat-thing
Sheila frees a girl Kareena from her magic prison, and there’s two magic Ring of the Heart and the Ring of the Mind that can send the kids home, but Kareena has a connection with Venger.
Notes: Frank Welker voices an orc
26. CAVE OF THE FAERIE DRAGONS
Essential? No Game Adaptation Friendly? Quite possibly! But I haven’t tried it yet. AD&D Monsters: Faerie dragons, giant ants
Tasmira, queen of the Faerie Dragons, is held prisoner by the evil warlord King Varen, who desires their treasure. Aided by the sassy little dragon Amber, the gang must free her and help her people find a new home.
Notes: Presto makes a reference to the 1950’s giant ants movie “Them!”
27. THE WINDS OF DARKNESS
Essential? No Game Adaptation Friendly? Quite possibly! But I haven’t tried it yet. AD&D Monsters: brontotherium. Bonus monsters: furry pet, darkling.
BONUS EPISODE: REQUIEM
Essential? Tough call. Considering it’s not official, I would say it’s strictly not essential. But if you want closure, watch it. Game Adaptation Friendly? Ask me later. AD&D Monsters: Hydra, bronze dragon, lizard men, shadow demon. Bonus monster: amoeboid
The final episode that wraps up the kids’ journey was scripted by Michael Reaves but was not professionally animated, as Mark Evanier explains on his blog. A radio play of the script was released with the DVD box set, including the original voice of Sheila, Katie Leigh. In 2020 a fan-made animation was released on Youtube which you can see here.
ESSENTIAL EPISODE FROM SEASON THREE: DUNGEON AT THE HEART OF DAWN
You must be logged in to post a comment.