Author: Toren

Not stupid – ignorant.

So I get on the bus in Coquitlam, and I put in my three dollars, which as I understand it is the fare for a two-zone pass. I say to the bus driver “two zones, please” and I plunk in my three bucks. I sit down and look at the thing – it says three zones. I don’t think anything of it. I only paid my three dollars for two zones so it must be right. I transfer onto the skytrain station. All is well. At Broadway Station, I get on the 99 and put my transfer into the slot. It comes back reading “upgrade required – $1.00.” I’m confused but I’m not going to argue with the driver while there is a line of people waiting behind me. I have a toonie and ninety five cents in change. I drop in the toonie and the driver gives me a new transfer, taking away my old one. So now I’ve paid a total of $5 (although one of those dollars was Ang Holds, which makes it even worse) for what I thought was a $3 ride, but the worst part is not that I’ve spent two extra dollars, the worst part is that I’ve spent two extra dollars that I feel I should not have had to. That’s the kind of shit that ruins your whole day.

Double-yoo-tee-eff?

Overheard today on 10th Ave, some thin, balding guy in his late 30’s or early 40’s talking into a cellular phone:

“Okay but here’s the thing: I agree with you 100%, but right now we need the money and he’s got the fuckin’ gun.”

And on a lighter note: clowns!

News from Harper’s:
Bush was disturbingly disengaged (“like a blind man in a room full of deaf people”) during cabinet meetings, and that many high-ranking administration officials have no idea what the president wants them to do and that they operate on “little more than hunches about what the president might think.” – Former secretary of the treasury Paul O’Neill
The International Monetary Fund published a report warning that the United States’ budget and trade deficits threaten to destabilize the entire global economy.
Britain released plans for new emergency powers that will permit government authorities to ban public gatherings and to destroy or confiscate private property without compensation.
A large new study found that up to half of all plant and animal species on land could face extinction by 2050 because of global warming.

Here’s a thought I had while lying in bed this afternoon: if a century is 100 years, and 100 per cent is 100 out of 100, shouldn’t a dollar be called a cent because it’s 100 pennies? Who’s in charge of these things?

I won the flail on ebay. I noticed that nobody had bid on it so I emailed the seller and asked if I could have it for $20 US including shipping (saving $7.50 US). It paid off.

This coming Friday they’re showing Big Night (Stanley Tucci & Tony Shalhoub) and Yin Shi Nan Nu (Eat Drink Man Woman) at the Placebo Sofa Cinema. It’s $5 for the evening, I’m sure you know. Then on Sunday it’s Tampopo and Delicatessen. On Sunday the 25th it’s one of my all-time favourites Miller’s Crossing with Gosford Park (good old Bob Balaban).

So, think about that for a moment.

As much a reminder to me as it is to you:

As you know (if you’re Anghold, Marlo, Stuey, Yvonne, or select few others) I have gone to a Paperfolders Around the Lower Mainland (PALM) meeting to do origami. It is organized by a very cool nerd by the name of Joseph Wu. He tells me that “CBC will have yet another interview of me on Friday night. On the Road Again, Jan 9th, 7 p.m.” I was looking at origami with Yvonne in a very kawaii Japanese stationary store (I don’t remember what it was called but Y would) at the Metrotown Mall and I think we can all agree that origami is good. I mean to go to another meeting to fold strange new worlds – hopefully this month.

The Thing, The Ring, And Return of the King
Metrotown burned me out – but I felt immediately refreshed once I got outside. The reason we went was to see Return of the King in the nice seats. I liked it (the movie). There were some things about it I really liked and a few things that I felt “meh” about. I hadn’t read the book so it was all new to me. Keep that in mind when I make my judgments. I’m assuming that I’m the last person in my circle to have seen the movie so I don’t feel the need to say “spoilers ahead.”* I really liked the fact that Frodo just didn’t let go of the ring at the end – that he didn’t conquer it in the end – that if it wasn’t for gollum Sauron might have won. I wasn’t too keen on Sam being able to take on Shelob. In real life spiders are really fast. But of course, they aren’t that big. So there is that. But still. Was she toying with him? I didn’t need Aeowyn (sp?) telling the witch-king and the audience that she wasn’t a man – I think we all knew that. I never thought I’d hear myself type this but I got a little impatient about halfway through the movie. Even though there was a lot of action, I got a good dose of it in Two Towers and I felt a little inundated with epic battle scenes. Or maybe it was the drawn-out buildup to those scenes. Or maybe a combo of both. Otherwise, I quite liked the ending and…well pretty much everything that I didn’t just complain about. I would give it a 7 or an 8 out of 10 I guess. The ending had me leaking water out of my face so it’s a good thing I was with Yvonne instead of all my macho jock friends who would make fun of me. Yvonne made fun of me for other reasons but I won’t go into that here. Besides, I’ll show her one day. One day soon – oh yes.

*”And I don’t need to remind you that I rigged the election. But I did remind you. Well, what’s done is done.” – Scudworth.

Cartoon News (Canadian TV)
Just some info for all my fellow local cartoon afficionados:

Teletoon:
STAR WARS: CLONE WARS Saturday @ 5pm, Sunday & Monday @ 9:30 and 9:35 pm
AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE Sunday & Monday @ 9:45pm
FUTURAMA weekends @ 9pm & 1am
HOME MOVIES Mondays @ 10:30 pm

YTV:
Astroboy premieres Jan 31

Dalia forwarded me this opportunity to mentor a child, and I think it would be a really good idea for me right now. In the forward, which was from somebody named Michael, was described a 12 year old girl who wants to learn how to be a cartoonist, specifically manga style. I don’t really do manga, but I went ahead and emailed the contact person (Teresa – “VSB district resource teacher – gifted education”) to find out more info. I got an email this morning:

“She is a talented artist and would like a mentor to show her new techniques in manga such as expressions, clothes and colours. She would like to improve her shading and proportions. If it were possible, she would like to learn about computer programs for colouring and animating. “

I don’t know if I’m the right man for that job. But also in this email:

“L is 11 and in grade 6. Since he was 3 years old he has made a variety of board games – all involving maps, some are historical and some are fantasy. L would like a mentor who enjoys role playing and strategy games so together they could design a game with mythical characters and go though levels or worlds or create a problem solving game that appeals to many types of people. The mentor would keep him on track, test out the games and help produce the game.”

That is perfect for me. And:

“B is 12 and in grade 6. He has visited art museums, tried computer art, has taken art classes and does lots of drawing. He would like his drawings to have better shading, better poses, more action and be less stiff. For his product B wants to draw a detailed fighting scene of a monster. He would like the mentor to help him with drawing styles, poses, lettering (like graffiti), shading or anything involving pencil sketching/drawing.”

Another good match.

Problems: “Two references are needed plus a criminal record check (free).” and I have to fill out some forms. The forms are fine…except I have no experience with “youth.” The criminal record check – no problem. Two references? Who the hell would I put down as references? I guess employers. Anyway – I think I might give this a go and see what happens. Wish me luck.

If anyone wants me to forward them the info for how to be a MENTORRRRR just email me.

Should I?

Finally I can talk about it openly.

I made Yvonne and Anghold calendars for Christmas. I finally got the gifts to them today. Anghold’s was called something to the effect of “Ang Hold’s Super-Fantastic Introduction to Dungeons and Dragons by Way of Toren’s Favourite 1st Edition Monsters 2004 Calendar“. It included staples like the beholder and the mind flayer, but also a couple personal faves like the thought eater and the grell. Both Yvonne and Anghold (independently) commented on the fact that the owlbear looked like a muppet (Sam the American Eagle>), and while Yvonne found most of the horrible monsters (like the umber hulk) “cute”, Ang found the purple worm legitimately scary. Heehee.

Yvonne got an altogether different calendar, called:

The 2-Tone Unsteady Players
presents
Best Loved Scenes From
12 AWKWARD MOMENTS IN HISTORY
a play directed by Cecil M. Frankenberry

So, if you can wrap your brain around this, it’s drawings & text of “awkward” instances in the history of the world, as if they were photos from a play on the subject. There was a cast of five actors, Floyd the Near-Sighted Skeleton, Snowgirl, Ewan O’Possum, Hello Cthulhu & the Clockwork Hippie>, plus the director, who, yes, is the Frankenberry from the cereal (he’s branching out from being a spokesdrawing for General Mills & getting into directing). I got a lot of help for ideas from Stewie, Mr. Tice, Rowan and many posts on various sites & forums, plus rummaging through books on hand. I think my favourite scene is the one in which Captain Oates (of Robert Scott’s doomed Antarctic expedition) committed suicide simply by leaving the tent with the words “I am just going outside, and I may be some time.” Although my favourite drawing is the one where they dress up Hello Cthulhu as the Mars Orbiter that NASA lost* and swung him around the stage on a rope, holding a jiffy pop pan in one tiny hand and some cardboard “solar panels” in the other, while a smoke machine belches the “Martian atmosphere” onto the scene.

*because one team used metric and the other team used imperial.