Category: General

A couple days ago I used one of the Cooperative Auto Network cars to do a bunch of stuff. This included taking the “boom box” I bought off Craigslist from my workplace to my studio (anyone have any old timey cassettes they want to unload, bring it on – the radio sucks), taking the original masters of Great Old Ones (that our old engineer Terry Podealuk brought to my workplace because he was moving) home, and the transfer of Kodos (my cat, for the uninitiated) from Kitsilano to East Van.

Many of you know that Kodos had a hard time adjusting to life in Kits. He hates frat boys and yuppies so his reaction was to strike out at anyone around him. He got in fights with Max the other cat, with Mike’s leg, and was generally belligerent for the first couple of months. He cooled off slowly over time, but I would inevitably hear tales of certain piquant interactions from the roommates when I got home from work or whathaveyou. This has always been a concern but the simple fact of the matter was that between work, my studio, band stuff in Chilliwack, and of course Deanna, there was just no way to get in the requisite amount of quality time with my canine dependent.

My studio, my workplace and Deanna’s are all within a 15 block radius. On the other hand, the distance between Deanna’s place and home in Kits is about 45-50 blocks. The solution that Deanna suggested and which I took was to move Kodos into her basement suite. That way the 3am bike trips home to make sure Kodos didn’t starve to death could be avoided, and I wouldn’t have to rely on the generosity of my roommates to take care of someone else’s curmudgeonly pet.

Interestingly, Kodos is reacting slightly better towards this move than the last one, even though there is a dog in the house! Maybe cats are naturally more pissy towards their own kind, despite everything I’ve been taught by cartoons. Maybe Kodos feels more comfortable with less footsteps surrounding him. Who knows. The hidey hole we set up for him in the bathroom is ignored, as he favours the spot behind the couch, but he comes out often and doesn’t hiss at Lunch the dog until she’s well within 4-5 feet. We often get to watch an exercise in cat recall as Kodos will walk around the living room, bump into Lunch, get all growly, sulk off, then get curious about what the humans are doing and repeat the entire process.

Deanna is convinced that in short order they’ll be best friends. I’m waiting for the bloodbath. Either way there’s now a better chance I’ll be around to watch my little Kodos grow up.

For anyone who cares, here’s the Scion XB commercial with my voice:

http://www.adgabber.com/video/video/show?id=546804%3AVideo%3A99338

It’s not on youtube for some reason.

Dreamworks, summer 2009. Not judging, just showing.

On the topic of antisocial curmudgeonry….

I got my cell phone last year and most of my friends were shocked. I got it primarily so my agent could contact me wherever I might be. Because acting stuff is usually very time sensitive, I couldn’t give her my home phone number and here’s why: I stay away from it for extended periods of time. I don’t check the messages. Even when I’m at home and it rings, I often don’t answer it. Why is that, you ask? I hate phones. I hate talking on the phone. You can probably hear this in my voice when I’m talking on the phone with you – I am succinct if not curt (sure, I’m abrasive all the time, but I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt to detect the subtle differences). I think it’s ridiculous that people give phones such a priority in their lives – that when the phone is ringing they’ll stop whatever they’re doing – cooking, working, interrupting a conversation they’re already having with someone else – to pick it up. Phones are decidedly inconvenient more than the converse most of the time, draconian and rude.

I didn’t give out my cell phone number to others until I absolutely had to. I don’t want people calling me when I’m not home – but that’s a little unreasonable these days as I am sometimes away from home for 24 hours. I have a specific ring so that I know when my agent is calling me. Often if my phone rings any other ring I simply don’t answer it. Sometimes I don’t even look to see who called, especially when I’m at my day job or otherwise occupied. I always know when Deanna calls me, because she doesn’t. She sends me a text message and that’s why I call her Best.

So the deal is, you can call me – but don’t expect me to pick up the phone or even get back to you in a timely manner. I usually save up my messages until evening (I get a better rate then anyway) and make my call-backs then, if I remember.

The ironic thing is I check my email almost hourly. Sometimes when I see that someone has called, I’ll email them rather than call back to find out what they want (I’m looking at you, KRL). This bypasses the torment of having to wade through small talk and irrelevant tangents. Text messages are also fine, though I don’t always reply to those either unless there is a specific question that I am expected to (and can) answer.

So for future reference, barring emergency here is the Official Toren Atkinson Flow Chart of Social Interaction Annoyance:

4: Email (to either of my emails, I check them both)
3: Text message to my cell phone (if you don’t have a cell phone yourself you can go to http://www.rogers.com/web/content/wireless-text/send_sms and just type it in on a regular keyboard rather than navigating the morass of cell phone buttons)
2: Call my home phone – like the message says, if I don’t call you back in a few minutes, I’m probably not going to call you back that day.
1: In person
0: Call me on my cell phone

And now you can never claim that you didn’t know the reason I stabbed you to death was because you had the wherewithal to call me on my cell phone. After all, everyone reads my blog!

Pursuant to my crisis of faith in art….

“Christians Demand Removal of ‘Satanic’ 10 Commandments” is the title of this news article at worldnetdaily.com Read it if you like (there are some hilarious bits I don’t touch on here) basically it says that a Christian organization called “The Resistance for Christ” is pressuring a community in Georgia to tear down a monument built “under a cloud of mystery” that sits on private land. The commandments that are sand-blasted into granite tablets are:

* Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature.
* Guide reproduction wisely – improving fitness and diversity.
* Unite humanity with a living new language.
* Rule passion – faith – tradition – and all things with tempered reason.
* Protect people and nations with fair laws and just courts.
* Let all nations rule internally resolving external disputes in a world court.
* Avoid petty laws and useless officials.
* Balance personal rights with social duties.
* Prize truth – beauty – love – seeking harmony with the infinite.
* Be not a cancer on the Earth – leave room for nature – leave room for nature.

The article goes on with a lot of speculation from all sides that casts the stone’s origins to an almost Lovecraftian conspiracy.

Now whether or not I agree with any of these “commandments” the real question is this: why was this monument erected? Was it for art’s sake alone? Was it a literal monument to faith – a modern day religious artifact? Or a combination of both? To me, this smacks of social commentary more than sermonizing, and the fact that the answer to this question is not 100% clear is its greatest merit.

In case someone asks you how many extrasolar planets have been detected and confirmed, you can tell them: [307] (if you wait much longer that will of course go up.

But how come Deanna gets some named after her and I don’t?

Yes, this is an artificial fish. Who remembers Blade Runner?

Engineers at the University of Kitakyushu have developed an underwater survey robot that looks good enough to eat. “Tai-robot-kun,” a 7-kilogram (15.4 lb) robotic sea bream (red snapper) with a silicone body covered in realistically hand-painted scales, features a unique propulsion system that allows it to move its tail and drift silently through the water like a real fish.